Any advice? Had a rough day. Actually having a rough month fed up.

Follow
Share

My Mom ended up not taking her medication on time she is suppose to take one with every meal it is for Parkinson s she sometimes doesn't take her morning one till 11 am and it's not being on scheduled some days she is really good I remind her all the time I even bought a pill box with the days mark on it well today we finally got out I set it all up with an old friend of her's because she has Isolated her self and that makes me feel Isolated also. I have no life I do every thing for her full time caregiver. I guess I need to hand over her medication and watch her? Well when I found out today after we arrived back from her friends it was 2 o'clock and I look at the pill box and seen that the morning one wasn't taken and now it is past lunch time so two are behind so I told my Mom again you need to take your med's on time Mom and then she snuck and had her husband bring her lunch time pill at 3:15 so two pills with an hour well I got really upset and said you can't be doing that you could get sick I was going on a roll even threaten to tell her Doctor her husband just shook his head like always and I said why are you shaking your head I call him on it for once he said your Mom is capable of taking care of her self then I snapped and said well what am I doing here then??? well I have to make sure she takes it on time I care about her what if she has a reaction anyways I am already at my breaking point this just tops it all off I have Fibromyalgia Then I said sorry to my Mom about harping on her about the medication I could see in my Moms face and speech she was getting overwhelm so I started feeling guilty I could see in my Step-Father's eyes that he knew that he was getting me upset. Hello I do his laundry and breakfast etc the works. So upset right now heading for a complete melt down none of my siblings care seriously fed up, I already ask my sister for help she freak out on me and said our Step-Dad's daughter can come vacuum I only ask because my back was in pain plus she offer to help before she was going to bring premade meals never happen plus all these other airy promises I have Fibromyalgia syndrome it affects the muscles and soft tissue, chronic muscle pain, fatigue, sleep problems etc. I also suffer from OCD and anxiety my relationship is falling apart I am at my wits end love my Mom dearly but she is two faced with her husband than with me complaining about him. Now my partner is upset about my Step - Dad saying your Mom is capable of taking care of her self. What do I do now?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
5

Answers

Show:
Overwhelm, you need a break! Arrange for care to come in while you get out for awhile. Mom may need someone to make sure her pills are taken on time. My mom with Alzheimer's needs me to give her her medication. Most of the time she looks at the pills she takes and doesn't remember she takes any. I have a dish I put them in at each meal, I then check the dish to make sure she took them and didn't leave a stragglers in there, which happens fairly often. You do everything for the two of them, I also have Mom's hubby to take care of. Thankfully he is cognizant and is a help with mom. But it is added responsibility for me. Good luck, take a vacation, and come back, if you choose to, refreshed.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Thank you all for the advice!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Overwhelm I went through this with my mom last week. Same thing. Missed her meds two days in a row and on the second day, told me she took them. I went to take her to the doctor and she hadn't taken them. I've offered to get her someone in to give her the meds at the right time. She refused. Similar to your mom and step-dad.

I finally (with the help of my mom's doc) realized I can't make myself sick because my mom is living her life the way she wants. You can't either. Let your folks do what they want to do. Offer help if they ask. You don't control the world and you can't make people do what's best for them unless they want to do that. You'll just make yourself sick in the process. So like NancyH says, let it go. If your mom gets sick, she gets sick. You've done what you can do. The bad news is, you don't control the universe. But the good news is, you don't control the universe! So put down that burden and give yourself a break. Set some limits on what you'll do and how involved you'll be. It's not your burden to carry alone.
Helpful Answer (8)
Report

What does their doctor say about the two of them? Does the doctor say your mom can double up on the pills if she misses one? Sometimes that's okay to do you know, but other meds you can't. How is the step-father's health? Are you in contact with HIS family too? Maybe they can help take some of the burden? But honestly, at some point I think you're going to have to let go and let them do their own thing. Unless you mother needs hired help/asst. living or whatever, you may have to back away. Sorry.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

You take two weeks off somewhere, because you are burned out. Been there done that.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Related
Questions