My husband sometimes acts more lost, more memory loss and walks in circles. He'll say he has to use the restroom but wants me to take him there. He just left his bathroom and is standing in there. There are so many times he asks me for something and if I'm busy I say I'll be right there and when I go to attend to him it's done! He also accuses the unknown ppl of stealing his stuff but I find it for him. The worse is he stole 2 new prescriptions of mine and hid them, never more to be seen. I didn't tell our pcp because I'm afraid they will take him from me and put him in a home! Our son (actually his stepson) wants to stay with his dad and give me time away, but I just feel like I can't leave him. He becomes quite aggressive and verbally rotten mouth on occasion and that's upsetting but I deal with it quite well. He's a wanderer! The police have been involved 7 times. I have to get the alarms on the doors tomorrow. Our home is beginning to look like a hoarders home. He wants me near all the time. I'm 74 and disabled so I do all I can with him. But there's a limit. I pick and choose what chores can be done. Also he's always looking for an argument! So I smile and tell him "I choose my battles, and that's not one of them!" But sincerely I'm lost about his faking it. I live here with him, I see the deterioration so faking it don't fly.
You're 74 and disabled. You're also down two prescriptions, presumably for medications which you do actually need. Would YOU pick you to be the sole caregiver for an occasionally aggressive person with dementia?
You're afraid of his being taken from you and placed in a home, but if you continue to ignore his difficulties and refuse all support I'm afraid that's exactly what will happen. Call your PCP, get those prescriptions replaced, and at the same time ask for advice on what's going on with your husband.
Has he been to the doctor recently to discount other causes of confusion? There are other conditions and they should all be explored because most can be treated. This should be done before he is given a cognitive/memory exam by his doctor.
I have not seen your husband myself, but please don’t jump to the assumption that he’s faking. Sometimes cognitive ability can ride in waves, and people can have good moments, followed by bad moments, followed by good moments again. It very well may be that he’s not faking, but just letting you know exactly what he needs. Try instead just taking his word for it.
Please get some help for yourself. If you don’t feel comfortable trading places with a caregiver, I’m sure someone to help you clean with certainly help. Even small things can help big loads.