My dad's empiric roots have festered and twisted themselves. Just to clarify: I'm living alone with my divorced dad, who is venting/complaining about everything on gods green earth, - I can handle people who complain normally - but he's always circling and building and circling and it's the same monologue-preaching I've heard for seven years in a row! It's the manipulation of everybody but himself, it's directed at me for being gay (indeed the government and my mother are to blame) or my sister's tattoos, or chemtrails and fake-news, my mother being possessed by demons and being insane, comparing himself to Jesus (though with modesty... I'll give him that), argumenting for his behavior because of a psychic-reading he once had - it's just the surface folks (the one my friends and everybody else meet)! I live with him! I have nowhere to run, and the cherry on top the depressed-looking ice-cream; he does it for hours! For hours and hours every day! It's not a conversation, I can hardy listen - if I were to, the preaching would continue for much longer! Or if I correct him, try to reason with him, just walk away - he won't stop... I'm truly lost. None of my attempts have worked. Truly, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again, and expecting new results... End-rant-info: Both my dad and I are depressed, I've seen a psychiatrist and all that, but we live below the poverty-line and as jazz-pianist I find myself without any inspiration - touching the keys suffers me great self-loathing - and I've been playing for 19 years. Whether the black dog in my life is my dad or not, I've been unable to anything from this place, other then standing the edge of complete despair, because I do love him so.

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When you say, has anyone else experienced their loved one's changing as a result of conspiracy theories...

This has been going on for seven years. It's not exactly a change, is it?

So although your lead question starts off as though you're looking for insight into changes in behaviour and personality, you're actually not, are you.

We can offer sympathy. We can offer suggestions. We are more than happy to listen. But without any clues about what you might be hoping for, realistic or not at this point, it's very hard to know what to say.

Except, maybe, - gosh, don't you ever get bored with him???
Helpful Answer (0)

Hi Danish,
One of the great things I've heard on this site is......

You don't have to set yourself on fire, to keep someone else warm!

Why can't Dad go into a facility? He is truly more then you can handle. Plus it's not your job nor responsible. Unless you make it so. He is not nailed to the floor.

Aside from his depression, you didn't mention much about his diagnosis, current meds, what type of Dr he's seeing, type of insurance, age. Just your frustrations. And trust me, that's fine. This is your site, and you can do whatever you need to we're here for you, for sure.

Dad is the Crux there. He definitely needs a higher level of care. Three daily shifts of fresh, well rested, trained medical staff, aides, cooks, etc.

He's being tortured, locked in a loop of paranoid madness that has become his world, with no way out.
(God I hate these mental diseases!!)
Thus, you're locked in it too.

Look👀, if you're going to live, *down the rabbit hole,* 🐇at least wait until it's your own journey. Don't follow someone down. Hell, you're not even Alice!

You're wasting your life, hopes, dreams and talent🎹. Dad needs more help, place him, FOR HIM. Then get out and work. Waite tables💲, bartend, serve drinks, 🥂preferably at a piano lounge. 😉

The world is chock full of creative inspiration! Help Dad, then get out there and LIVE!🎶🎵🎼

Sorry Danish, I got a little goofy at the end there😄.
Helpful Answer (3)

Are you on medication for depression?

Is dad on medication for depression, hopefully one that addresses rumination?

Do you walk out of the room when he rants?

Loving someone doesn't mean you have to listen to them.
Helpful Answer (1)

"Whether the black dog in my life is my dad or not, I've been unable to anything from this place, other then standing the edge of complete despair, because I do love him so."

I think you must escape from this living situation that would drive anyone bonkers, and is causing you to despair. Seriously, DanishGuy, I second Sendme's advice to get out! Could you stay with a friend, find a roommate, camp, sleep in your car, hitchhike across the country doing a bit of travelling.... 
Helpful Answer (1)

I loved my dad too. and he was a great dad. sometimes I think all he did his whole life was work HARD.

but ALZ changed his brain.

he talked & talked. non-stop sometimes. stories about the war or his job. and everyone he worked with. most stories were repeated and I swear they were "word for word"

as soon as the story ended. there would be a short pause. then he would re-start again. and I always felt rude if I wasn't listening. but after awhile it was very difficult to ignore - there is big problem. so unfortunately my sister and I, both working, couldn't let him live along with my mother at home any more. and away to assisted living they went. not voluntarily. but necessary :(

so no conspiracy stories. but lots of other stories. but regardless - REPEATED talk.

you may getting to a breaking point. :(

it didn't take long for me.

edit sorry if I implied ur dad has dementia ? has he been to a dr lately?

and that's a condensed story about my parents, cause it was worse than the above.
Helpful Answer (2)

Move out. Live on your own.
Helpful Answer (3)

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