Hallucinations and repeating the same one over and over again. Any advice?

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Mom is 88 and in a nursing home, she has very little eye sight left due to macular degeneration. She has show confusion and hallucinations in the past and it was a UTI. However, the last few times, her urine was clear. She has the same hallucinations over and over again, they are very vivid to her. Some are disturbing, like my dad (who has been gone almost 10 years) and I left her at a graveyard. Most are the same ones with a few twists. There are signs all over her room, farmers in overalls come and watch tv with her, kids are running around playing, they have a big sale all over her unit and it's busy and fun. Yesterday she called and asked me to bring her towels and sheets to her apartment, she didn't know why I thought should would want plain white. Then told me the same story about the farmers and the sale. She said they left her lots of cleaning supplies and I could take them home.

First time it happened was in November, then not again til around New Years. Now it's happening about every 10-14 days. The nursing home and providers don't really have any answers, except dementia. My sister died very unexpectedly the day after Christmas and of course, it was hard on mom and all of us. She seems to be getting worse, mentally, since then.

I don't argue with her about what she sees, just agree, because I don't know what else to do. Unless it's something that could cause harm to her. I am frustrated for her, the nursing home staff is great. They don't have much turnover, so she has the same CNAs most of the time.

Any tips on what to do? I want to ask her doctor what he thinks, there is an NP that goes to the home frequently. She is amazing and mom likes her. I feel helpless.

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Nanc... I feel one of the hardest things we have to do is accept some of the things our elders go thru... and sometimes there is nothing we can do...but be loving, reassuring, ect....We can only imagine what goes thru their minds at times like these and it's very real to her... breaks my heart for both of you...but possibly a med change will help... I have found that what works , sometimes will only work for a short time, as the brain chemistry is changing.... I hope they find something that helps her to not be so afraid..... hugs and prayers for a loving solution...
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that eyerishgal is pretty sharp. great advice, work with what you have. everyone is imo a little different and will respond to different stimuli.
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Thank you. I do have full POA and full control over her heatlh care. But, when she is thinking well, I always include her in decisions. She is on an anti-anxiety medicine, she was on Effexor, they are weaning her off that. She has been on Remeron since November. She has always been a nervous/anxious/worrier type, it's just getting much worse. I answered the phone yesterday and she said "what are you going to do?" She was worried about our big winter storm. I told her my son and I were home and safe. We have plenty of food and lots of people that would clear my driveway. I hate it that she worries, she is in a good place and has great care.
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You're right not to contradict her hallucinations. They are very real to her and it doesn't do anyone any good to say to her, "It's not real, you're not seeing that." You can support her by telling her that it sounds very scary but that she is safe and you won't let anything happen to her.

She just may be 'slipping'. Her age could be catching up with her and affecting her mind. Someone doesn't have to be diagnosed with dementia or Alzheimer's to have mental impairment. Talking to the NP sounds like a good idea. Maybe she can prescribe an anti-anxiety medication to help your mom feel less threatened by the hallucinations.
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Yes, definitely talk to the MD as long as you have a health care proxy in place. Doctors can't talk to you under HIPAA privacy laws without it. She may be confusing dreams with real memory and that is not uncommon in later dementia.
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