Green eyed siblings are trying to cause trouble for me. What are my rights?

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My parents sold their house and built an addition on my house 11 years ago and moved in with me. My 91 year old father passed away in January and I am caring for my 89 year old mother who has dementia. She will need to move to an assisted living facility soon. Her investments and income will cover about 2 years of care. She may then be eligible for medicaid. My sister, who is the executor of my father's estate, has his financial documents showing the cost of the improvements my parents made to my house. She has also seen checks my father has written to me throughout the years to cover household expenses. And there was a loan to my business 8 years ago that he forgave. This is not being well received by my siblings. My father anticipated this reaction and drew up a notarized document two months before his death stating that all improvements to the house and financial assistance was a gift as acknowledgement of my role as my parents' caregiver and is not part of the estate. My sisters are telling me when they apply for medicaid on my mother's behalf I will be required to account for all financial assistance from my parents for the last 5 years and it may be viewed by the agency that they were giving away their assets to qualify. They tell me I could be forced to sell my house to repay the funds. Does this sound plausible? After living in a combined household for 11 years do I have any obligation to account for anything? I never wrote checks to myself - my father initiated it all.

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A poa is effective any time unless it is written specially. That's #1. #2, your sisters are correct. Medicaid will look back five years and exclude Medicaid benefits for as many months as it deems appropriate to recoup what it perceives as gifts to you. Sans a caregiving contract, it is very possible your sisters are correct. You need the counsel of an elder law attorney.
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I can only tell you that after your mother goes --cut ties with your siblings. I am so tired of the drama that happens when such tragedy strikes that I am okay with cutting the loss of siblings. Yes, I had similar drama and now the siblings want to get back together as if nothing happened. BS! Count me out!
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Wow what a great person you must be. Caregiving can be a very thankless endeavor. Please do your best to try and have homecare help first. Nursing homes by us are $13,000 a month. Rediculous!! She could be cruising around the world. Not sure you hear thanks enough for all you have done for your mother already but i would definately talk to a lawyer who can hel you keep on keeping on taking such great care of your parents!! God bless you and yours!
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That's a good point, captain, the fact that there's a transparent paper trail here shows that she was not trying to hide anything, and certainly putting an addition on one's home--you can't hide that! The point could very easily be made that the mom & dad ONLY did that addition on THIS daughters home precisely because this shows how much they TRUST this one daughter--over and above the other daughters/sons. I hope there's an update from the OP on how this scenario develops. I'm always on the side of the caregivers! And I totally know about the "green eyed siblings".
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alisson,
springing poa does have its drawbacks . when my mom was hospitalized with a heart attack and delirium , i was instructed to get the springing poa " activated " by hospital ( aps ) social worker . our attorney issued the documents but moms bank wouldnt honor them . our attorney said that the springing poa was so unusual that the bank decided if they were to err it would be on the side of safeguarding their client ( mom ) .
the whole end of life business is rough going . the honest kid leaves a paper trail while the sibs who actually bilk and mooch know to deal only in cash .
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Ok I see where your dad's letter was notarized. THAT is good. The home addition being 11 yrs ago should not trigger Medicaid penalty period. However, the business loan, what was the terms for paying that back? Loan made 8 yrs ago, to be paid back over following 5 or 10 yrs, then forgiven.....it MIGHT be counted as a "gift" by Medicaid. Definitely get a lawyer who can help sort this out.
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Seeking Serenity, I am doubtful (unfortunately) that things will turn out in your favor. Because there is a 5 - years look back for your mom. If dad "gifted" 2 months before January (mentioning it in the letter, saying the business loan is forgiven) then it is within 5 yrs. Also, since your sister is POA for your mom (who has dementia and cannot change the POA) then your sister, is in charge of applying for Medicaid, not you. If I were you, I would immediately file for Guardianship of your mother. Do you have irrefutable evidence that you were supplying not only financial, but physical assistance to your mom? Can mom's doctor office, for example, verify that you were the one bringing mom to all her doctor appointments? What you need, is a lawyer, and the lawyer is going to need lots & lots of Evidence, that shows only you were looking out for your mom. Also, think of the counter -case against you (yes there will be one, if there is not one already.....). How will a non-related Judge look at the addition put on your home? The business loan? And will the Judge say that letter was written under duress? Who has the original copy? Was it written in your dad's hand, and/or was it notarized? Did he have an attorney write it up for him? Lots of little alarm bells in my head over this. I truly hope it all turns out for you favorably, however the siblings don't want to see mom left without Care, and, unfortunately for you, if mom is denied care because you received loans & home improvements, I can see why they might insist you pay for mom's care until she qualifies (including liquidating the assets you received ). But a lot will depend on how the Medicaid application goes, and if your sister is in charge of that--look out! You need a lawyer!
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Because I have this genetic autism disability, I will not have to move. I can own and keep the condo as long as I want to. I now live alone at age 59. However, when I do sell and move out or die, Medicaid OR will have to be repaid for the covered cost's of my late mother's care. And because I have lost my permanent job three years ago, now unemployed and currently do not earn money, Medi-Cal is providing my health care insurance free of charge. After I die, Medi-Cal will have to be repaid. Because I had no children and am also the youngest sibling of our family, I may donate any of my left over assets to charity.
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Just realized I don't think that is your question. How does a springing POA become effective? I'm not quite sure, but I've been warned it will be a hassle to get POA effective at an already chaotic time when the person becomes incapacitated. Hope someone else gives input about this. I am planning to have my father do durable POAs so as to avoid any later issues with getting it made effective. Good luck!
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There are different types of POA - there is a durable/standing (effective at signing and through any incapacitation), or springing (which goes into effect when person is incapacitated.)
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