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Hi, I live with my grandmother who has dementia. She particularly loves to spend hours in the toilet. This includes her bathing and also her peeing time whenever she visits the toilet. For instance, when she bathes, she can take up to 1 to 1.5 hours for a simple shower.


We found out the she spends very long in the toilet during her bathing/peeing time majorly because she will also wash and scrub the toilet floor as well as the toilet bowl EACH time she visits the toilet. My grandmother is reaching 84 years old, and we have advised her countless times not to wash/scrub the toilet as she may slip and we have delegated the house chores among us. Since she has dementia, we understand that it is difficult for her to take our advise.


Is there a way to prevent her from cleaning the toilet daily each time she patronize the wash room? I even hid the pails, toilet tools and detergent to prevent her from cleaning. But in the end, she will use the pails available in the toilet to "scrub" the toilet floor. I sincerely hope for any advise that can assist to minimize this situation.


Thanks.

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Some people with dementia develop OCD behaviours, there are medications that can help with that. Please discuss this with your doctor.

https://www.agingcare.com/Articles/obsessive-compulsive-disorder-in-elderly-parents-138686.htm
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julialah Feb 2019
Hi Cwillie, I have never thought of linking OCD with dementia and your article is very helpful. I will bring my Grandmother for consultations and hopefully the medication will help. Thanks!
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I think there are child proof locks for toilets. You will need to be with her though when she goes and...don't let her see how you need to open it. They sometimes are smart.

Your water bill must be outrageous. Sorry, 15 min is long enough in a shower. Tell her she is wasting water and we r suppose to be conserving it. Or that the water company has been around and said you use too much.
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julialah Feb 2019
Hi JoAnn29, we have told her many times. She will remember when we advise her, but will forget about it the next day again. Yes, 1 hour shower time for an elderly is way too Long. We are always worried in the event if she slips since she spent very long in the toilet. The child proof lock is a good idea, will consider to install it also. Thanks!
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You are lucky that she is not refusing to shower. Get a water saving shower head. Make sure you have handles for her to grab. Let her do it.
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julialah Feb 2019
Hi snowquail, thankfully she has no problem bathing. We have a shower head also, will consider to install the handles for her. Thanks!
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I’m impressed that you have enough hot water for showers that long! As soon as the hot water tank runs out, that chilly water is a great reminder to end the shower!

I agree with snowquail. Be glad she’s showering. Can you get a bedside commode that you keep in her room and fake cleaning supplies (fill a spray bottle with water and get her a new wand) so she can clean in a safer environment?
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julialah Feb 2019
Hi JuliaRose, apparently she is fine with cold showers also. As Long as she sees water, her instincts will tell her to clean the toilet unfortunately. Maybe I can remind her that the cold water serves as a reminder that bathing time is over. Thanks!
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