Currently my grandmother is in an assisted living home in SC. She has a degenerative spine and just recently had a stroke. She has 6 children and they are divided. The one with POA and Medical POA thinks she is just fine in the assisted living home. They didn't even want her taken to the hospital when she had the at stroke and keep telling the DR. that she had a living will. (Which had nothing to do with her being on machines to keep her living) The DR. also told them she needed rehab and they don't even want her to have that. She is back at the assisted living home now. For several months she has not been capable of going to the bathroom. She needs 24 hour care and because of the money and some other family issues 3 of them don't seem to care about her well being. Then there is the issue of her home. Apparently there is a living trust and her home and some land is in a living estate and has been set up this way for about 3 or 4 years. however the one to inherit the home is one of the one not wanting her moved because of the money and he losing a place to live. If she is moved to a home can the nursing home come back and file a claim against her estate after she passes to collect what cant be paid since it has only been 3 or 4 years and would they have to move out of the home?
Skilled nursing facilities play an important role in senior care, but if my loved one's needs were able to be met by an AL, I'd pick it over a SNF any day.
I would start by talking to the assisted living home. Is she beyond what they can legally cover?? Are they aware of her recent decline? Get them behind you if possible. They COULD be a great source to accomplish what needs to be done! :) Hope this helps!
If you are looking to become the decision maker for your grandmother without her appointing you as such, and without the cooperation of her six children, you have a pretty tough battle ahead of you.
As for the questions about her estate, see an attorney if you feel something is being mismanaged.
You have a long road ahead, but you will need to seek out an attorney to make anything happen.