My grandmother has Alzheimer's and was just placed in a skilled nursing facility this past weekend. She is mentally incompetent. Her husband (also her PoA) called 911 last week and had her taken away saying he could no longer care for her. He is 82. He tried assisted living with her before and it caused a huge family fight when he decided to move home again with my grandmother. He shut my mother out and refused to let her visit. Yes it's complicated. Now he's sold their home and is moving away and saying he is taking grandma with him and his daughter will care for her. She is not a nurse. Is there anything we can do here? My family is completely devastated and we are tired of seeing my grandmother suffer as she's yanked from one place to another. My mother is going to file for emergency guardianship but I worry we won't get anywhere. Are there any laws that can protect her and keep her in the nursing home where she is safe?
The nh can also provide the documentation you need to support claims of grandma's care needs.
I certainly hope your mother is awarded emergency guardianship! That would put her in charge of where GMa lives.
Is grandfather your mother's dad, or is this a later marriage?
I think what grandfather doesn't understand is that a mentally incompetent dementia patient not only needs 24 hour care, she needs care by three shifts of rested, trained people, who only have to push a button to get immediate backup if needed. She needs to be in a safe environment, with quick access to medical help. Even if his daughter is Florence Nightingale, she can't single-handedly provide 24-hour care in a private home 7 days a week.
Is GPa truly devoted to his wife, or are there also some financial considerations here?
Do you know his daughter well? Do you consider her your aunt? Is she a pretty reasonable person? I wonder if talking to her might be useful. If she informs GPa that she can't do 24/7 care, and he already knows he can't do it, would that stop him?
Let us know as this is working out. It certainly is a sad situation.