My 92 y/o Grandma is getting outpatient physical therapy. She surprised us by being capable of a lot more than what she thinks she's capable of. The problem is that while she does a lot with the therapist without complaint, things are another story at home. She whimpers/cries/moans when she has to do something as simple as get up and go to the bathroom at home. She makes noises the whole way to/from the bathroom and while she's in it. This is less than 15% of what her therapist makes her do and she doesn't behave like this with him. At home, she acts like she can't do anything like putting her feet in bed by herself. She keeps saying, "I can't", but she's perfectly capable of doing all these things. Then sometimes on the way back from the bathroom, she'll act like she's out of breath and says she needs to sit down - that she can't make it back to the living room. Yet, the therapist has her walking 5 times that distance without issues or complaints. I don't know what's going on here. I suspect Grandma is trying to manipulate me, but I'm not sure how to respond to her, especially when she's panicky. And to be honest, that whiny, whimpering, crying thing is really ticking me off. If she's looking for sympathy, she's not going to get it from me - not with that behavior and not after what I've seen her do with the physical therapist. Before she started physical therapy she was relatively fine. Now she's all moody. Before she said she wished she could get better, but today when it was bath time she got upset and she wished she weren't here (she meant alive). She whimpered and carried on through the whole bath, but at least she didn't complain about being cold (that's a first). I don't know what to do with her anymore. I also don't know what to make of her behavior. She didn't act like this before she came to live with me two years ago. She's getting worse. I don't know if this is related to the return of her blood clots (we're not sure when they developed), if she's developing dementia (or if she has it and it's worsening). I guess ultimately, it makes me feel bad, like things are my fault because she didn't act like this before she came to live with me. But then, I try to remember that she came to live with me a few months after Grandpa died and maybe she acts like this because she's free of him grumping at and berating her (she's free to do as she wants). Then I also remember that the year she spent in assisted living seemed to give her a sense of entitlement and laziness because they did everything for her. Any suggestions or insight on any of this?