My grandma died, the will was changed but I'm still on the checking account, how do I protect myself?

I called the bank, they locked the account so no autopay can hit or fees accrue but they did transfer 4K out the day after she died. It went into another account in the same bank that has their names on it. I guess he's calling them to return the money and if they don't, it goes to fraud. He said that I'll get the money back but it's complicated bc it's an issue within the same bank. My inference was that I will eventually get the money but I think the bank will eat the mistake and the likelihood of them getting into real trouble is low. I'll just give it to my uncle bc they guilted him into paying for the funeral saying there's no money. It's not my money anyway so at least he won't be so burdened. It's a good thing I called today bc the December SS just posted and it'd be a nightmare if they moved that and I have to deal with the gvt

Hannahhonee, did your grandma add their names to the acct? Are you saying that they'd be forging her or your name in order to draw money out?

Does the bank not have branches in NY? If not, first I would call and talk to the bank manager and let them know what's going on and then ask for their fax # so you can fax them something in writing stating your concerns. Then follow advice for removing your name off the acct. Tell them you have not written a check in X months, someone changed your password, etc.

My understanding was that until the will goes through the court process (probate?) that money is still your grandma's. If you are saying that the acct was a joint acct (not just that you had signing privilege but that you that it was held jointly with full rights of survivorship, that money should be yours. If your grandma wanted them to have her share she would need to write that in her will, I believe, and then it should only be part, not the total.) If it is an amount of money that would help you, don't give up too easily.

Also unless you see your grandma's will, do not believe what your family is telling you. What should happen if you are not included in the will is that you will receive a document asking for you to sign and accept the terms of the will and will not object as a next of kin. I would not sign that till you are absolutely sure; I know you don't want drama and that is a valid pov but at the same time, when you get through some of the grieving process, you might feel differently.

I am so very sorry about your grandma and also very sorry that your brother and mom are addicted. I really do not understand how people manage to be so conniving when they seem to be unable to manage their normal affairs. I know it must be very painful to you on several levels. Good luck with this.

However you escaped the fate of your brother and mother, you are blessed. I understand the sense of betrayal you feel from your grandmother. I'm sure that is difficult to accept more so than what your brother and your mother have done. You are an outlier. Above the norm. I'm proud of your attitude to not allow yourself to be taken down by their hurtful reaction to your grandmothers death and their ability to manipulate her. Your bank will be able to tell you how to get your name off the account BUT I agree with the poster who said, take a breath and think this through. If your name is still on the account, you can move the money to another account. Then, if there are overdrafts, etc it will be on the folks still on the account. Perhaps you can take the money and pay for GM funeral or cremation if you don't want the money for yourself. You are in shock right now and will be for awhile. Take care and come back to let us know how things are going. You can be free now. Change your phone number and move on. I'm wishing you all the best and I hope you can find your way to forgiving her for what feels like a betrayal now but might be a blessing in the long run to be free of them. You don't really know what happened. Don't rush to believe drug addicts. Remember the good times and move on.

Crumbs, Hannah.

First thought - so contest it! At least then you'd get a dollar!

Seriously. I admire and applaud your rejection of angry feelings towards your grandmother. But are you not angry for her? At first sight it looks as though your mother and brother, under the influence no doubt, really pulled a number on her; and dimly recalling what the household was like I don't like to imagine what that involved.

Back to practicalities - call the bank and ask their advice. Don't get fobbed off by a know-nothing clerk, either - persist until you get hold of someone with experience of deceased persons' accounts, and make sure you explain that that's what you're facing.

I'd have thought you should be in the clear as regards future liabilities. All of the payments you were routinely making were solely and exclusively for the benefit of your grandmother. She is now done, and so are you. Hugs to you, please keep posting x

Thinking on, just wanted to send you hugs.

It is hard to understand why your grandmother didn't tell you what had happened. My first thought is that she was conned, and maybe suspicious that she'd been tricked into doing something stupid but not sure or too embarrassed to speak up.

Or she might have been afraid to tell you, for all kinds of reasons. Because you'd be angry. Because they told her you'd be angry, so she mustn't tell you..? Because she didn't know where else she'd find the money, and wouldn't have expected you to go on paying?

None of these excuses her. But she was old, tired and maybe a bit frightened. Too hard for her to fight, perhaps.

But yes she did you wrong, even though I doubt she was the chief culprit. Hugs x

It's ok about the will. I'll be ok. I just don't want to be dealing with anymore of this crap. I'm trying to move on from this disaster

If your on it then it could very well be a joint account. it doesn't matter who takes it out. It belongs to either or party. Go withdraw all of it and open a new account and deposit in there.

If your on it only as a POA, then there's nothing you can do I'm afraid. POA died with your grandma. Hope it's joint!

I'm not POA, my actual name is on the account and the checks. She may have very well added one of them to the account but the only way to remove me (or anyone) is for me to fill out and sign a form from the bank. I never did anything like that. I guess I'll find out tomorrow, I hope.
I did see the will. The both of them called me on a conference call to ask me where I planned on staying for the funeral. I just said huh? Then they both started LAUGHING and my brother said "it's my house now b$765, should have got home faster" and my mom said "guess things don't always go your way do they?" I kept cool and just said can you send me proof bc I have a transfer on death deed that gma said I was supposed to file so I'm confused. Anyway, he sent me a scanned copy dated March 8, along with more taunting. it's a legal will and that's that. No point in fighting it cuz less than 1% win and the APS findings are actually helpful to them re undue influence and competency.
There's no probate for the house bc of the transfer on death papers. All of that is moot though I'm very hurt that she was taking my money under false pretenses. For example, since she changed the will, I paid for the new roof, hot water heater and washing machine. Each time, she told me to choose what I think bc I'm the one who is going to be stuck with it. I can't legally ask for it bc I didn't say it was a loan or contingent on getting the house but I still find it cruel. The worst part is that she was the only person I trusted and thought had my back. She really broke my soul. She could have told me instead of letting people LAUGH at me. I feel like garbage.

I believe if one of the "next of kin" isn't mentioned in a will, they have a right to contest it, and the lawyer or court (can't remember -- my mom got one but it was a while ago) will contact those relatives in writing asking them if they agree not to contest. However if your mom is next of kin then maybe it wouldn't apply to the next generation (grandchildren.) And then that clause your grandma put in...ugh.

I don't know if this is any consolation, but even if your grandma wasn't demented, it really seems like the very elderly have a hard time standing up to those around them. They will give their caregiver or closest family a run for their money, but then have a really hard time saying 'no' to those in the next ring out. Maybe they have a difficult time sorting out info and making good judgement calls about where people's interests lie. I just wonder if your grandma was having a hard time on some level and wasn't a match for your brother and mom?

Anyhow I am really sorry this happened to you. And I sincerely hope your brother and mom can find a way out of their addiction.

How did he get the money? If he forged a signature go to the police. The bank should back up a forged signature. They have signature cards for a reason. Was he taking to pay bills or personal.