Grandma keeps paging me to help her in the bathroom despite the fact that she's capable of doing things herself. She says she needs help putting on her pullups, putting her pants on, standing up, etc. There have been several times I've caught her lying. I've watched her through the opening in the door because she neglects to close it all the way. What she sometimes does is she'll call me in to help her pull up her underwear/diaper and pants. But when I go in she'll still be in the process of wiping her front (while standing). She'll say she can't pull up her pants and I'll say that she needs to try on her own before calling me. She gets frustrated and says she did try. I tell her she couldn't have because she can't pull up her pants before she's wiped. This always shuts her up, which suggests that she was fibbing. If she wasn't fibbing, she would typically continue to argue.
If I get upset and fuss at her or just rant so she can hear me, she stops being helpless and can do things on her own, at least for a while. For what it's worth, when Grandpa was alive, he used to fuss at Grandma a lot. I don't know if it was on a daily basis, but I know he got irked at her a lot. I used to think he was a mean old man, until Grandma moved in with me and I then understood why he got mad and fussed at her. She's incredibly annoying. Add in dementia and she could drive God to insanity.
What I can't figure out is why she always thinks she needs help. She told another family member that she likes being helped. In some cases she's said she's afraid she will fall, even though there's little fall risk in what she might be doing. Sometimes I think she just doesn't want to be bothered to even try. I'm not sure if dementia is playing a part in any of this. What I do know is that the phrase, "help me, help me" means nothing to me anymore. I've heard her say it so much when she didn't even need help. She's like the Boy Who Cried Wolf.
Does anyone have any insight on this? Perhaps there's an aspect that I'm not seeing.