My grandfather is seeing a little girl not there and his legs worse....suggestions?

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Hi all, I have some more questions. I have read old threads here that explain about the elderly "seeing" little kids that aren't there, and this can be a UTI, which Im going to have my grandfather checked for. But he also dreams about the kids, mainly a little girl who is extremely frequent. He talks in his sleep, so I hear him as well he as "sees" her during the day. Then he claims hes not talking in his sleep that hes talking aloud because he has no one to talk to ( we are there). Ideas? Can the home nurse test his urine or does he have to go in to the DR?

(Also, since he is blind I have also read of the Charles Bonnet syndrome.. so Im taking this in account because hes had some issues of little bugs , flying things as well as shadows..people.. etc. )

2nd question... hes having more trouble walking around so are there caregivers that come to the home for someone who sometimes or all the time cant walk? I know they do, but I mean can a regular caregiver or CNA handle his issues?( besides an agency) How do I figure out what new items he needs once this happens? He already has the man urinal and a "pan" for the other. Transporting to the shower, he would need help to "slide" him on the seat correct? He will have to have a male caregiver if he does because I am not sure how much longer I can try to lift him. He does shower on his own, but its getting harder for him. Is there a way this can be done at his home? I know you all said he should be in a NH but.. he is still of sound mind and the Drs said yes, he needs some one with him all the time..but he is still of sound mind. So forcing him to a NH wont work. So as long as he agrees for help at home.. which he sorta is.. me and that caregiver twice a week.. hes ok at home.

Sorry so long!!!!!!!!!!!

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Ashlynne, thank you for that :) marymember, I hope you were able to get some answers. Your going thru a lot and I wish you the best. You welcome BrightBod,hopefully your grandmother is doing better!
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Thank you Me1000 :) , I’ll make sure she stays hydrated, and I’ll check with the doctor about her pills, she takes different pills, and also keeps the cats away. And I think everything will be okay!
Thanks again.
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marymember, Could you post your questions again in a new post? That way they will more likely get the attention they deserve.
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I have several questions.
1. Friday my husband couldn't remember if we were married, nor for how long.
This is the second time it's happened. But he knows the territory and doesn't
lose his way while driving. He has terrible headaches. Namenda has a side
effect of headaches. I would like to know if any of you give your Alzheimers
loved ones Namenda, and if so, do they suffer from headaches.
2. Do any of you know of a veteran suffering from Alzheimers who sprayed
Agent Orange in Vietman? My husband sprayed A.O.from a helicopter.
3. My granddaughter,almost 14, was admitted to a psychiatric hospital yes-
terday. Shehas been cutting herself. She is Attention Deficient. Her birth
mother was on drugs the first three months of pregnancy..she never saw a
doctor during pregnancy..My son and daughter-in-law adopted her as a new
born.
3. Do any of you feel like you might also have alzheimers? My doctor says I do
not. But the stress of my husband plus the fact I have Power-of-Attorney for
my 98 year old aunt in the nursing home; plus Powe-of-Attorney for an
almost blind woman is getting me down.
marymember
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Perhaps the child spirit that comes to him is a sister who has passed and she comes to him in the form he remembers her from childhood? Just a thought.

My grandfather grew the most amazing chrysanthemums. The day my father passed I was 200km away. Suddenly my apartment was filled with the strong smell of chrysanthemums. I looked everywhere, the hallway, the balcony, but no, it was inside and, before I even got the news of my father's passing, I knew. His father had come to collect him and he let me know my father was safely on his way to the other side..
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pamstegman- I see your point, and I will keep an eye on him. I have brought this up to his Dr and they say dehydration is the reason so far, maybe because hes blind too. But they are the ones saying he is fine. I hope he is of course I dont want to lose him. But, I will keep an open mind to this possibility. Im sorry about your daughter and I pray she accepts the NH and care she needs. Hugs.

jeannegibbs - He has insurance and Medicare and I told him one day I will be working so he needs someone there all the time Im not. For years the Drs suggested someone at night for him because that's when he has the most trouble. He refused and they left it alone while we continuously told him he needs it. After the last stay at the hospital, we just stayed there and haven't left. Another Dr he doesn't usually go to asked me if Im there all the time, I said mostly and she said he is at the point he needs it( plus the med he is on makes him dizzy). I agree, he needs 24hr care. I will go over finances and call around meanwhile, but I agree, the NH might be his best bet after a while. Good point about the cruises.. good example.

Ashlynne- Thank you for sharing and I do believe that some people may have that communication to spirits, Im not sure about my grandfather. But I see your point. Your experience made me think of the life experiences some have, esp you. Its interesting about the books and music box, and I read animals are the first to know. He always talks about his sisters and mom who have passed ( how wonderful they all were) as well as he had many male and female friends growing up and now ( many have died now tho). Most seems as if he is taking care of them.. making sure they aren't getting hurt etc. No, as far as I know he never lost a child. Im thinking hallucinations maybe at this point? And never say your weird, you are an open minded nice person :)

BrightBod- She could just be thinking your cats are dogs, but do keep an eye anyway. Make sure she is hydrated and all her pills are not causing the problem. Also make gets her rest. I hope everything is ok for her and good luck to you.

-Thank you all, I have a lot to think about.. YOu all helped !
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Wow, I never thought of it like that, my grandmother has always mentioned saying a dog, and being scared of, and sometimes she tell that “dog” to go away, but I keep telling her that there’s no dog here, I never worried about it till now because I have 2 cats at home so I thought she is thinks they are dogs… is this something that I should worry about? Or is it quite normal for elderly people?
And thanks for sharing this, I would never know if I didn’t read this.
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As a spiritualist, if that's what you want to call it, I have a bit of a different perspective. I believe that spirits of those passed are all around us, either those connected to us in some way or those we inherit with a house or object. I have had many experiences in my life. Mostly we can't see them but if we are in tune they will make themselves known. I have acquired some beings with this old house but they're harmless and, for some reason, even though I live out in the middle of nowhere, I always feel safe and protected. My dogs often stare into the dining room for ages and a music box in the bedroom goes off once in a while by itself - it hasn't been wound in three years. Occasionally books from the book shelf are on the floor by morning.

The blind, both human and animal, develop an amazing sixth sense. It may well be that this "child" is actually a spirit that has attached itself to your father, he can see it and speak with it, especially at night as the middle of the night, especially when the ground is damp, it is optimum time for spirits to visit. The "child" may be from somewhere back in his life. Has he lost a child or a child he was very close to during his lifetime?

On the other hand he may be hallucinating and remembering a childhood friend. We will never know but, whatever it is, if it's not upsetting him and giving him some comfort I'd let it be. My mother, now in a nursing home, sometimes sees people and dogs but they don't frighten her.

I'm sure many reading this post will consider me to be weird but I don't mind, I'm a nice weird lol
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Alas, Grandfather is no longer of "sound mind." He may be competent in some realms -- for example, he may be able to write or change a will (I don't know) -- but he is not safe to be on his own for long stretches of time.

Certainly, you can find in-home help to do all the things that are done in a nursing home. The question is, and he afford it? Paying for one-on-one care is generally more expensive than paying a whole nursing home staff who each deal with a few to many residents (depending on their role). At some point it does come down to a practical matter of finances.

Personally, I would love to live at a resort, or go on one long cruise after another, and never have to mop a floor again, or cook a meal. Why don't I? I could afford that for many 4 months, and then I'd be on welfare, and they don't send you on cruises! We all have to compromise what we'd "like" with what we can realistically afford (financially and in energy levels, etc.)

Grandfather would rather stay home. You want him to stay home. I sincerely wish you good luck. It can certainly be arranged if GF can afford what he needs.

Medicaid (if GF qualifies for it) will help with either NH costs or with some in-home services. They will not provide 24-hour in-home care because at that point it is more economical (for taxpayers) to place the patient in a care facility.

First, accept that Grandfather is not "in his right mind." Things are changing for him. They are not likely to get better. Then accept the doctor's observation that GF cannot be left on his own. Once you accept those two facts, figure out how best to meet his needs given the resources he has.

My sincere best wishes for you both.
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Very often here we see postings about a family member who is seeing things, can't walk or bathe, sometimes can't eat or has trouble swallowing, an the concerned family member still thinks the patient has a sound mind. This is a case of denial, a refusal to accept the reality of the situation, not wanting to lose someone they dearly love. Recently my daughter refused to accept a nursing home and said NO to Hospice. She is in denial. Her refusal does not add to her longevity or functionality. She is not of sound mind.
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