Ok...tonight was interesting. Mom is a very large woman, and her incontinence problem is getting worse - fast. Before I moved in, she wasn't using any sort of protection at all, and the house reeked of urine (among other things). So I got her started wearing the max absorbency Poise pads, extra long, etc - the heaviest duty pads I could get. That worked - for a while. Now, however, those pads just aren't cutting it. She's saturating them. I honestly think that even though her mind is still pretty good (just a little forgetful and kind of spacy sometimes), she's just not really aware that she's leaking as much urine as she really is. She says there is no burning or pain when she urinates, and she's not running a fever, so it's not a UTI - that was my first concern, because the problem seems to have gotten worse fairly quickly.

Whatever the source of the problem, I need to find a source for good, heavy duty incontinence panties or undergarments. (Need a very large size, equivalent to a woman's size 13-14 in underwear - keeping in mind that an underwear size 13-14 is NOT the same as a pants size 13-14 - you ladies will understand that, I'm sure - but a man probably wouldn't.)

I've checked a couple of places online, but dang, are these things expensive....but it's either upgrade to the Depends-type undergarments or keep paying a higher water bill for the constant washing of clothing, chair/bed pads and bedding. Mom is agreeable to trying them - especially since she keeps "losing" her pads. (They get twisted in her undies and fall out on the floor or slide down the leg of her pants - don't ask me how - I haven't figured it out myself yet.)

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Since this happened so suddenly, I'd take her to a doctor. She could still have a UTI without the burning or even a fever. They'd do a culture.

The whole protection pads is an expensive problem for caregivers. I recently learned something recently that boggles the mind - the pads are "time sensitive" and past a certain date aren't sold by the companies under the company name. (This is, by the way, hearsay, but it sounds very believable as the source was a physician.) The "old" product is shipped to third world countries and likely sold under a different name.

Anyway, there are people trying to find ways to warehouse these castoffs here in our country so that caregivers can get them at a lower cost. I know this doesn't help you at this point, but I was really affected by reading this.

There are some places that do have recycled medical equipment and new but donated items. Our community has a place called HEROES. There are many such non-profits across the country. I expect that boxes of incontinence pads go fast if they have any, but it's something to look for in your community just in case.

Take care,
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Has she been to her doctor to find out why she is incontinent? My mother was like you describe and finally, she had to go to the ER and they discovered congestive heart failure. Once she started treatment for that, the worst of her problem subsided.

I agree that the Depends are expensive. You can order them on-line in value packs, but still it it $180.00.

Try some of the men products, for now, and see if they are more absorbent. Good luck.
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Thanks for the advice on taking mom to the doc - she doesn't want to go (we have this struggle all the time), and her symptoms, or whatever they were, have subsided. To be honest, I don't think it was a medical issue. I watched her carefully yesterday and today to see what was going on with the incontience - she is simply waiting too long to go, and then, because of her weight and the strain on her bladder, combined with lack of muscle tone in that area, when she gets up to go, she leaks a pretty large quantity of urine. Sad fact of her size and sedentary habits that cannot be corrected now.) When she waits too long to go, she gets up, leaks a large quantity into her already-wet incontinence pad, and then it can't take any more liquid, so she drips all the way to the bathroom, where she leaks another large quantity when she bends to sit on the toilet. (I know, maybe TMI, but it's what I'm dealing with.) With me urging her to go more frequently, the leaks are easier to manage. She's been somewhat incontinent for a long time, so the small leaks are nothing new. I think the fact that she wasn't going frequently enough was the issue. I told her if she didn't start going more frequently, she would end up with a UTI and then she would have to go to the doc - no choice about it - and that seems to have improved the situation.

One company has already offered to send us samples so we can try them out, so we're going to give that a shot. They have incontinence undergarments in Mom's size....I hope. I have to measure her waist and get back to them to get samples sent.
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