Is it ever a good idea to quit our jobs to care for our parents?
What about getting fired due to calling out because the caregiver cant come? When my husband and I moved out of the city and up to the high desert area, it was to care for his mother, his father had just passed away. We live about 50 to 60 miles from Downtown. All was good, we both got jobs at the local casinos. Casinos can be a blessing and a curse. They are open 24 hours so shift work is the way things go. I used to work full time, but when Mom came to live with us she was not well. She had just had small strokes and could not live alone. I was exhausted most of the time caring for her and working so I cut my hours down to 3 days a week. I found a lady in the area ( L ) and she became my first caregiver so I could go to work. She was with us for a year before she found another job that had Health Insurance. Then I needed another caregiver, I found ( A ). She is my current helper. She is older that my first helper, and she does not have great health. She has gone to the hospital by ambulance 3 times in the past year. She is in the hospital again right now. Also, she is religious and cant work on Thursdays and Sundays. That doesn't help me when I can and do work those days.
I contacted an Agency for In Home Care. There is one lady ( S )that can work for me, is close to my area, except that she has other agencies that she works for and other clients too. Now, let me explain that since I am part time I no longer have a set schedule. I can work the morning shift one day and swing (6pm to 2;30am) the next. I called the agency with my new schedule on Monday and they called this worker to see if she was available for Friday and Saturday. She said yes, but then today the agency called and said that she is not able to work those days for me. I am getting frustrated again because I don't know from one week to the next if I can work or not. Also, for the Holidays the rate is time and a half. So that means $30 plus an hour.
My husband works the graves shift and sleeps during the day, then goes to work. This means for mom that she will be alone from 10pm until 2 or 3 AM when I get home. My husband will feed her dinner, help her to bed, give her meds. She has Dementia but does not wander. She hardly gets up except to use the bathroom. I don't want to leave her alone, but its only 3 days or nights. I hope things will go ok.
I did some calling on Residential Home Care. Boy are they expensive. I talked to a really helpful lady about her home and was about to set up a tour when I realized that I hadn't asked her price. She said $4500 a month. I bout fell off my chair! One home that I did visit was a fairly decent home, run by a family and they wanted $3000 a month for a private room. That is way toooo much for Moms budget. So I guess Im venting, but what are other people experiencing while caring for their parents?