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Three weeks ago, mom went into the hospital to get iv treatment for a stubborn kidney infection. While there, she suffered a major stroke and then kidneys shut down. She had a second stroke and had fluid on the lungs. It is so hard to watch them die right before your eyes.

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id refer to them as home care to the patient. " hospice " is a pretty terminal term and imo, needs rethought. they are pretty useful i s'pose. they can help you with med bills, funeral arrangements, etc. they bring additional equiptment as needed right up to an air comfort bed when a patient is late stage and in pain. if you get some substandard helpers and they get too pushy, remind them that they are guests. the field does attract some bottom feeders of the healthcare industry. that isnt just my opinion, its been my experience. watch em, theyll steal your weed iz what im sayin' ..
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They are patient, helpful, listening and kind. It's hard, very hard to go through this and better not to do it alone. At the very end, they save you from calling in 911 and the coroner. They do the death certificate with the Hospice RN signing off and the MD already in approval of her action. They come within 2 hours to comfort you, dispose of medications, and hold your hand, offer advice. Better than family; they are calm and reassuring.
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We have had Mom home for 2 1/2 months now on hospice. What you can expect as others have said is for it to be hard and somewhat painful. The other thing you can expect is absolute co-operation from your hospice staff. We wouldn't have survived this long without them! Ask them anything! Talk to them if you are feeling guilty about any thoughts you might have had. We've all been there and they can help. After all, they are with you and your Mother to help you get through this very difficult time. Also, don't be surprised if one of her nurses gets very attached also.
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It is extremely hard to watch someone you love die, with or without hospice. But hospice workers are trained specifically to deal with this passage and can be very comforting for the family and the patient.

My husband died at home, on hospice. Hospice services can be provided in a medical setting, in a home, or in Hospice Houses.

What you should expect is that Mom will be kept comfortable and out of pain, and that all needs will be met immediately, without any red tape of getting authorizations from insurance, etc.

This is hard. It will continue to be hard. Hospice can soften it a bit.
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My father was in hospice when he was dying from an inoperable cancer tumor. They were the most wonderful people. My dad was in denial that he was dying. I think Mom was, too. Dad insisted on feeding himself through his feeding tube (since he wasn't dying in his mind) and the doctors allowed that so he would not get upset. Even though by that point his body wasn't digesting the formula.

The hospice place was quiet and peaceful and respectful. There were bird houses outside every window and pretty gardens all around. The nurses were amazing and very caring. I don't know how they do it. A chaplain was there but my father, who was very religious, tried preaching to him instead of accepting his counsel.

I was there for a week myself and stayed all day, either in dad's room or in a sitting area. Each day I would get online to check in with work and no one was ever bothered. My brothers and sisters and I would also visit together, discussing the difficult issues we were facing.

The hospice people made my dad's passing very peaceful for all of us. If he had stayed at home it would have been very difficult. His staying home wasn't even possible since he could no longer walk.

The hardest was when I had to leave to go back home in another state. I knew I wouldn't see Dad again but I still told him I would see him at Christmas as we planned. It was hard. But having such a peaceful place in which to face such a difficult thing was a blessing. When he did pass, a nurse was with him and they called the rest of the family and let them say good-bye. I think hospice workers are special people.
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