The hard part is over.
I'm matching you with one of our specialists who will be calling you in the next few minutes.
I don't see this as giving up. The body seems to be saying what is happening. I want to make sure that we are listening.
For many conditions, there are clinical trials that may hold out the hope of a couple of extra months of life, but when you are talking about extending life by less than a year, you really need to look at the QUALITY of the person's life during that treatment, which may cause terribly unpleasant side effects.
Hospice isn't giving up, in my book. Hospice is embracing comfort for the patient at the end of a life that is limited by the ravages of an incurable disease. Better to die comfortably, if you are going to die, than in agony and terror.
"I feel like I owe it to him to get him well." Dear one, we do not have that kind of power. People get old, sick and pass on. It is part of the cycle of life. It might help you to see a grief counsellor about this. My heart goes out to you as you are so obviously very distressed. ((((((hugs)))))) This is a very painful time, I know. The best you may be able to do is just be there with him, make the time as good as possible, let him know you love him.
My personal opinion, I feel we see far too many families insist on life prolonging procedures when it’s obvious there is no quality of life or hope for a cure.
This is tough territory. You’ll likely get more comments on this thread. Good luck to,you.
We followed daddy's lead. When he was ready--he just quit eating and drinking. Hospice was a godsend and allowed him the dignified end he wished for. Would I have wanted him kept alive with feeding tubes, Iv's and such for just a few more months? Absolutely not. He had Parkinson's---a horrible way to live.
I don't think it's giving up,but probably bringing your Mother comfort and you,a little help.Take good care Nikki whatever you decide. Lu
You didn't mention what your loved one is suffering from, how long s/he has been sick, how old s/he is, etc.
Is this the first time you have been told of your LO's decline? Have you gotten a second opinion? How does your LO feel about going on hospice? Is s/he mentally competent to make that choice?
If s/he has been dealing with a long standing illness and treatment hasn't worked so far or if your LO is very old, weak and unable to regain health, it may be time to "let nature take its course". This would be a good time for hospice.
If your LO is normally in good health but has become sick lately, a second opinion would be valuable. You would need to find a different doctor who believes your LO would benefit from treatments.
Please make sure you talk with hospice and understand what you are getting into. Hospice does not support life 'extending' treatment, instead they focus on the patient's comfort as they near the end of their lives. If you and your LO want to try treatment to bring him/her back to health, don't choose hospice. If your family member doesn't want further tests, treatments, procedures, surgeries, etc. then hospice is the best choice.
If it's their time, nothing you try or do will "bring them back to health".
Death is an inevitable part of life.
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