How can we get my father's license taken away from him before he harms himself or someone else?

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My father is 83 years old and has had 2 accidents, one just last night. He goes out to dinner almost every night and drinks 2 or 3 glasses of wine then drives home. How can we get his license taken away from him before he harms himself or someone else?

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You need third party help, even if you must call the police. Start with the doctor. Try the dirvier's license people. Get the car away. Do what you must, knowing it will be hell, but also knowing what he'd feel like if he hurt someone. He is putting others in danger as well as himself (as you know or you wouldn't have written this). You likely can't do this alone. Authority behind you will help. You are one of zillions of adult children with this problem (and that includes the wine element). Take care,
Carol
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Forget the drivers license, you need to take away his car. He is not thinking clearly. Don't assume the lack of a license will prevent him from driving. You will not forgive yourself if he injures himself or someone else in an accident. Jellybeans suggestion is good - but a missing car is best. Does anyone live with him or can he afford a helper?
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Yes, by all means call the dr, and if needed the police. We had the same problem.. Dad was 90 years old and got hit by a drunk!! We disabled his car and he fixed it!!!! We took his keys and he had another set hidden!!! So, we did the next best thing. We took the car and told him we were having it fixed, (brother is a mechanic)!! Then, when he wanted it back, we told him that since we had POA, we could be sued if he drove. That stopped him for awhile. He then took mom's car since she also could not drive. So, I asked to borrow it for our daughter who was coming home for the summer. Since it was in mom's name , we sold it and gave her the money. No car!! Can't drive!! The best thing was the POA. He listened to it because he did not want us to get into any trouble. It is very difficult to take away their independence. The dr. convinced mom that she could not drive. Good luck!
Linda
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Call his doctor and let the doctor know what is going on. Get your Dad to go to the doctor for any reason- check up, med refill, etc. Let the doctor tell your Dad that he can't drive. If the doctor finds a medical reason he can't drive, it's the doctor's job to report him.
You could also take the battery out of the car in the mean time.
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My husband's dad was driving the wrong way on one way streets, because he didn't care to obey the law, and lost the necessary abilities in other areas too. Lost, driving from Michigan to Florida, a policeman tried to put him in a hotel and take his car, but Dad was clever enough to outwit him and be on his way again. Then he hit a drunk on a bicycle. Too numbed to be hurt by the fall, he picked himself up from the ditch and went back on his way. He and Dad were fortunate, that time. Not long after, Dad fell off a roof (at the age of 87), fracturing his pelvis, and ended up in a Nursing Home. His son got POA, and put an end to the madness, but not without great effort, and a hostage situation. (Too lengthy to tell, but almost too funny not to.) It is a tough situation. Lovingdaughter's creative thinking worked in their situation. Some are more difficult. Hard to do, but vital! All of the above suggestions are good ones; just find what works for you. It's worth a little parental wrath, and our discomfort having to do it. You never know whose life you will save. Take care, hero caregivers!
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My husband's dad was driving the wrong way on one way streets, because he didn't care to obey the law, and lost the necessary abilities in other areas too. Lost, driving from Michigan to Florida, a policeman tried to put him in a hotel and take his car, but Dad was clever enough to outwit him and be on his way again. Then he hit a drunk on a bicycle. Too numbed to be hurt by the fall, he picked himself up from the ditch and went back on his way. He and Dad were fortunate, that time. Not long after, Dad fell off a roof (at the age of 87), fracturing his pelvis, and ended up in a Nursing Home. His son got POA, and put an end to the madness, but not without great effort, and a hostage situation. (Too lengthy to tell, but almost too funny not to.)

It is a tough situation. Lovingdaughter's creative thinking worked in their situation. Some are more difficult. Hard to do, but vital! All of the above suggestions are good ones; just find what works for you. It's worth a little parental wrath, and our discomfort having to do it. You never know whose life you will save. Take care, hero caregivers!
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My dad also threatened to go get a taxi, go to a car lot and buy a car if we didn't give him his keys. After much arguing, I convinced him that no one in his right mind would sell a car to a half blind 90 year old man on oxygen!!! You had to know my dad to appreciate the fact that if he thought he could get away with it , he would. He was a tough old man and after 4 years, I still miss him with all my heart. He was my rock.
When he died, I cleared out the closet to better fit my mom's clothes. When I finally got the closet door closed for the first time in years, I found a shotgun and in his dresser, the extra set of car keys he had been hiding!! He was still determined to get his car back!!!! Had to love the man!! Good luck in your efforts.
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My husband did something to the car so it wouldn't start, and then we would hide the keys and say we can't find them . You just have to do it. It was so hard for me to do that it took his independence away but probably saved his life and others as well. Good luck to you.
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