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Mom has a terrible appetitie and she is getting weaker by the day. I've tried everything and she is withering away. I think she is giving up as she had told me and I hate to see her like this. I've threaten her with a feeding tube. In fact, she was in a nursing home and somewhat healthier. I promised her I would not put her back in a home but, she is not doing good at home at all. She did not want to die in a home because she feels her time is near. I told her I do not know what else to do for her and she replied by saying there is nothing left to do.
She is getting the best care possible and still I feel there is more that could be done. I've done some research on stimulating appetites but, she has to be willing to do this for herself.

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My mom was prescribed Megese. It's a liquid appetite stimulant that she took twice a day because she didn't want to eat anymore. She had plenty of time left, as it turned out. And the captain is right that she also wanted more savory foods that she could taste, which got past the medicine she took. Some may want more citrus, like my dad did. And dehydration is a problem and causes weakness, so I would get Tang or kool-aid as my mom couldn't have carbonated drinks, and she didn't want the sweetness of Ensure. My neighbor and PT caregiver couldn't understand why I always had dirty dishes in the sink until she stayed during the day and she saw how often I cooked to entice mom to eat!!
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Betterdays - Of course you want your mother to live and be well, but maybe that's not possible. We all will die, and maybe it is her time. A dying person does not want or need much food, and a feeding tube would just be torture for her. Starving to death would be horrible for a strong healthy person, but it is not at all the same for a person who no longer feels like eating due to illness and age.

Have you talked to the doctor about hospice? Your main concern is for her comfort, and they are experts at that.

I hope that giving her an appetite stimulant will give you more time with her. God bless you.
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when peoples time gets short their body systems slow down and dont require much nutrition. if she stops drinking water she only has days left. id suggest you do a little reading on end of life and the dying proccess. your wanting to nurture a body that may be trying to wind down. its akin to watering a dead houseplant..
there is one other possibility. you may just be a horrible cook.. a female customer of mine lovingly sent me home with a pint of split pea soup for my mom one night. did i say split pea soup? shit, i meant briny swill. mom took one sip from the pint jar and straight armed it back to me like a nazi salute. she never said a word. mom had been spoiled on chicken and veg chowder with thickener and sour cream base for years.
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I feel for you - my mother was the same way. Threatening her will do no good - she really can't help not having any appetite, as I finally realized. Her doctor prescribed an appetite stimulant, and it has helped. Though she doesn't eat like she used to, she does eat a lot more than before she started the medication and she gained some strength. Ask her doctor if he can presribe something for her. Your mom may feel it is her time, but you don't have to watch her go that way, not eating anything. Try to make sure she gets fluids and if she will drink the nutritional drink Ensure, that will help her keep up some strength. I hope this helps. I am also taking care of my mom at home, so I know how you feel. But it is better to have her comfortable in her own home than at a nursing home. She gets individual attention at home. God bless .
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