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Hi,

Some of you may know that my mum was robbed recently they took all her money the good news is that the bank have refunded her. She now has the money to get POA and everytime i mention it she changes the subject? She was keen before and now wont discuss it.

I am the main caregiver and live with her she is getting worse every week more confused etc.. its time to protect her and her assets so we can use her home for NH costs if we dont get this done before she becomes incompetent they will freeze her assets and pension? Its getting scary now as we could have serious problems in the future.

Any ideas? and any stories of how you appraoch this with them I feel time is running out?

Most of my family live abroad and my bro down the road has his head up his......and refuses to discuss anything with me.

My mum hasnt alot just a small pension and her house and I need to get this sorted asap.

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Sorry guys if her old boss was around hed be well over 100 years old!!!! She understands POA but is reluctant to hand over that much cash its a lot for her but I will work on her its only a matter of time before shes robbed again. I already have to control her money which is not easy I need this for peace of mind regarding her welfare and she knows this the hard thing is that she is still very aware of everything and in denial about her mind I will get her doctor to advise her they seem to listen to docs?? Its not that my mum dosnt want me to have POA its that she dosnt want to admit shes got mental problems will discuss with doc and see if he can talk to her. Will let you know and thanks for advice. "one day im going to wake up and laugh at all this???????????????"
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I agree with the ex-boss/lawyer suggestion, but only for his assistance in convincing your Mom to give you POA (not for him to be the POA). I cannot imagine you want a stranger having legal decision-making power and control over your Mom's finances and medical care - you are the primary caregiver and blood relation. Would you want to be doing all the work and then have to submit to someone else making decisions for her? I would not hesitate to enlist the help of any trusted collegue, friend or neighbor to sway your mother's mind to consent to give you POA. That is all they would likely be willing to do for you in Mom's best interest anyway. I could virtually guarantee nobody else is going to come in and do what you do for your Mom as caregiver, nor would you want them to.
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Excellent suggestion about her former lawyer boss. What about another trusted outsider - doctor or priest or even the local grocer or other businessman?

Suggest that if she got a bad case of pneumonia or fell and was unconscious, you wouldn't be able to approve her medical treatment without a POA. Or go to the lawyer and make you her POA, and her your POA. (you can revoke the latter as soon as she's out of sight.)

Good luck. She's a feisty one, isn't she.
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If the lawyer she worked for is still around, ask him to present this to her. She will trust his opinion and if she makes him POA you will avoid a family squabble.
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I may have to investigate this guardianship? dont know if this exists here? will call a solicitor next week. My mum is quite clever and worked for a lawyer so when I ask her to come and sort out POA she says "why? because you think im losing my mind!" Eh yeh!! thanks may find out whats going to happen legally. I dont know what guardianship is and what rights would I have? My scumbag sister was here recently and trying to get mum to sell her the house as prices very low here now was disgusted and now want mums assets protected asap. My mum is vunerable right now and someone has to protect her.
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Kazza, if she won't sign a POA...my mom wouldn't either...then you have to get her proved incompetent by a doctor and get guardianship.
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