My Fil is in his early 70s and has been diagnosed with early dementia with some parkingsons symptoms. He has always been strong willed and a bit argumentative but he has become so out of control our whole immediate family can not deal with him. He can turn on the charm so that some people think we over exaggerate but we all have been the brunt of his explosive rages.
He has had his license taken away but still insists on driving locally. If my Mil doesnt drive him where he wants to go after being bullied into it then he will just drive himself. When the sons attempted to discuss some of these things with him he raged around our properties and nearly drove a truck backwards into a pond. (This of course was the fault of the truck.) No one could calm him down and he eventually walked all the way home when we all disengaged and the keys were taken away.
He has had run ins with all his neighbors and one neighbor recently told us she would call the police if she showed up on her property again. Evidently he threatened her with a gun. He said he shook his cane at her.
He has times when he seems quite fit. Running around playing ball and working on the farm. Then other times he can hardly walk, hold a spoon, and falls down. He switches drs often and has avoided any mental evaluations. Sometimes he just wont go. Anytime anyone disagrees with him he becomes extremely angry and scary. If we try to suggest anything he will do exactly the opposite of what we are suggesting. (I.E not buying anymore expensive items or getting rid of something he can no longer care for.)
My Mil is exhausted dealing with him and all the problems he gets himself into and I sometimes worry for her safety. I fear he will not get the help he needs before he seriously hurts someone or himself or they end up in serious trouble legally or financially. Please give us some advice. I fear taking his guns and keys away will send him in a horrible rage which Im sure would result in the police needing to come. Please..what can we do?