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He a brother that lives 10 mins away but doesnt help. FIL 86 years old blind, Dementia. My Husband is the Main Caregiver and he never gets a break. His brother lives 10mins from us and never helps. When we ask for help he says to call the lady who sits with him during day and pay her. or that his grandson has a baseball game. All the excuses in the world. the BIL Wife has been thru this with her mother father and aunt and still doesn't help to get her husband to help us. It is very frustrating. Please help with some advise

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I might contact the Tennessee Commission on Aging and Disability. Use those words and their website should come up. They have a lot of information about resources that might help you in the home or info on a facility that he might receive care.

Additionally, you might get other help from TN Division for the Blind and Visually Impaired, Adult Day Care, SNAP and Medicaid. I'd find a way to apply for all services and funds that you and your FIL might qualify for.

Caring for a person who has dementia is very challenging and then add to that them being blind, I would be very wary of attempting it myself. Many people consider that a job for teams of people. I can understand why other family members may feel overwhelmed or not inclined to step in. I wouldn't use that against them. They may have their own reasons for not getting involved in your FIL's care. I hope you can find some resources that will help you and your FIL.
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Unfortunately you are not likely to get brother to help. Get additional help and pay out of FIL funds.
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