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I've recently become a caregiver to my grandma. She can't get into bed and has to wake me up every time she goes to the toilet. If she tries not to wake me she falls out of bed cause she can't get herself up into the bed. She ends up perched on the edge and falls out. Its not that i mind being woken up but when i am a 24/7 care giver its rough with no sleep. She is getting depressed and that worries me the most. If she didnt expend so much energy on simple things she would not feel so tired and maybe would have the energy to get up and out while she still can. The biggest problem we have is getting her IN the bed. Now I get behind her and pull her in. She gets up several times in the night and can get up and to the toilet but can't get back in to bed. Any ideas?

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I used a baby monitor for my gram stop I could hear her. We got a bed alarm so I knew when she was texting to get up and a toddler bed rail to not only prevent her from falling out of bed but she couldn't get up without assistance due to the rail. It folded down, which was very convenient for us. Is she using a walker or a wheelchair? You can get a transfer belt to aid you helping her.

My gram had purchased a new high bed as well and we had to insist on the hospital bed.

I started taking care of my gram 2 years ago and waited as long as I could to keep her dignity and independence. I came up with a few ideas to help her like putting a big orange piece of ducktape in the favorites button I the remote. I programmed all the channels she watched and she only had to hit the one button and it was easy to find for her. Always called her diapers "panties".

I was very blessed that God allowed her to decline slowly so that I could grow into my role and do the best I could for her, as I'm sure you will also.
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A bedside toilet would shorten her trip, but she still has to get out of bed to use it.

I used a baby monitor (audio and video) with Mom so that I knew when she got up. I would watch to see that she made it back safely. Sometimes she would fall. As time went on, I had to help her more and more with the whole toileting procedure. Eventually she forgot where the bathroom was- just a few steps from the bed. So sad. The monitor was very helpful for me. It panned so that I could see all of the bedroom but not see her on the toilet, just the doorway going in.
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It's really tough for seniors that mattresses are so thick these days. Shorter people need a stepstool just to get in bed! Forget about sitting on the side to put your socks and shoes on. What we did to buy some time before getting a hospital bed for Mom, was to go to a mattress store and buy a low profile foundation. It's about 5". The foundation that came with the set is 9", so you can see the 4" might make enough difference. Using that allowed us to continue using the bedside rail that fit between the mattress and foundation. First we tried using the mattress w/o a foundation (using slats for support) but the side rails of the bedframe prevented using the safety rail. Hope this helps...
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You have to do the therapy after joint replacements. Are you encouraging her to go out to walks with you or just go round the grocery pushing a cart. A roller walker is also very helpful and has the seat she can rest on. Can you get her an electric recliner, she can sleep in that and should be able to get in and out of that even if it is just to transfer to a commode.
If she needs to urinate so often has she been checked for a UTI?
The decline you are seeing is not normal after joint replacements so talk to the Dr and try to find out if there is something else going on.
There should be close to full recovery from knee replacements in about six months.
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The high bed needs to go.  That's a nightmare waiting to happen. You can temporarily take the bed off the frame and use the mattress on the box springs. You can also look into getting a bedside commode. 
As far as her knees, did she make that decision on her own? I am fairly certain a surgeon would request a family meeting prior to any surgery especially with an older person as the surgeon knows that person needs more support & would need to involve the family. Plus a patient needs to walk after hip surgery-if she had bone on bone arthritis they have to fix her knees first or she would have great difficulty post hip replacement if her knees were causing so much pain. Just think if the hips were done with bad knees. Talk about immobility!
Hard decision either way. A lot of people put off those knee replacements until they can't handle the pain and conservative treatment has been tried and no longer works (cortisone shots). Did she attend rehab after her knee surgery? Did she have both at once? 
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Well she can get rid of the hospital bed once her knees are better. It's a rental arrangement unless she keeps it several years. Make sure she does the therapy for her knees.
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What are the simple things that she is working on that you say makes her tired?

Why is she getting up so often during the night?

Have you considered how much fluid she's consuming in the evenings?

Have you tried a bedside toilet?

I'd invest as much as possible in addressing her nighttime mobility issues, because a fall can cause a fracture that makes it very difficult to come back from in a senior. If funds allow, I'd invest in an overnight person to sit up and watch her.
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I've also seen people sleep on a mattress without the bed frame. You could also put the mattress on the box springs. It just depends on how tall she is. An advantage of the hospital bed is that there is a hold bar that she can grasp to get herself back up and in the bed but it doesn't keep her from getting out. Medicare will pay for the bed if you get the dr to order.
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She will resist. She just purchased a new bed - that clearly isnt working. I'm going to have to get g we to see the new bed has to go. The Dr can get her an adjustable bed??? She just had both knees replaced at 75 and now her hips are bad. I don't know how the Dr thought it was a good idea to replace her knees and didn't see her hips are bad???? The knee surgery almost killed her. She went from being a very active healthy woman to a depressed immobile mess. It's clear why she would be depressed. I just want to give her as much independence for as long as possible so she can feel good about herself. I want her to live without feeling like a burden - cause she is not. It's difficult to get her to change her house to better suit her newly developed issues
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Ask the MD to order an adjustable bed for her, one that can be raised and lowered. In nursing homes, they leave the bed as low as possible for patients who at risk of falling, so they are very close to the floor.
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