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And not have elder care attys teach families to hide the home and money?I watch families neglect their loved ones. Parents left alone and children even live close by. Moved family home into trust or other family names. I have heard why the churches don't do more to help the parents...
Senior programs through the towns are for people that have zero money not people that have hidden there family money.
Reverse Mortgages help with paying for your parents medical care and help. But your parents money is not for the kids but for there care. It's not just the adult kids that do this but the parents not wanting to pay and leave the money to the kids... Te past generation of baby boomers have been left huge estate money from their parents.. Parents have lived in nursing homes on medicaid... Or the neighbors have had to keep a eye on the parents because the adults lived in other states....I know I did this for my aunt and her child lived in Michigan and did nothing. She even managed to steal money from me after her mother's death.. I cared for my Aunt critically sick for 6 months and when my cousin came she gave me a check for $500.00 as a gift... ON IT FOR NURSING SERVICES, what .25 cents per hour.... I never cashed the check I was so insulted.. My cousin showed up for one week during that full 6 plus months of her mother critically ill. I finally sent her mother my aunt back to Michigan... My cousin stole $81,400 that was from a lawsuit for my nursing services that I never charged her mother for.... She filed a lawsuit to get me paid for all the RN services because I refused to take the money from her. In this lawsuit the daughter and atty stole my money that they used in her lawsuit.... This was my aunt that also didn't want to pay for her nursing services, so she filed the lawsuit she got hurt for... Then gave her two grand children two checks for $75,000 and I got not one dime..... Her daughters a teacher and now a librarian and she stole my RN wages, I got nothing for super 24/7 care. I'm a widow and could have used the salary but it was my father's sister. There is a god but not for everyone. The atty decided to split the money between she and himself.. My aunt put a lein on the acct but I have been paid not one dime.. He;s a legal Malpractice atty in Smithtown NY
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I am very sorry for so much distress and poor behavior within your family. It sounds like this fits the "no good deed goes unpunished" maxim.

Did you have a specific question for us?
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Elder Law Attorneys teach families to hide the home and money??? If money is owed to Medicaid, the home is sold to pay for the elder care it doesn't matter if it is in a Trust or not. Trusts are used when there is a large estate, it helps when it comes to probate taxes.

Reverse Mortgages are loans.... once the parents pass on, the house has to be either refinanced within a couple of months [if the adult children can qualify to obtain a regular loan] or the house is sold to pay back the Reverse Mortgage, plus interest, plus fees. If nothing happens, the house goes into foreclosure.
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I might have believed that parents left alone were innocent, sad victims too, until I had my own experiences, got on here and read a lot more stories. Sometimes the kids are mean hearted and greedy, some just avoid being faced with the sad nature of progressive dementia and physical deterioriation, but some of the parents were horrible parents and continue to be as abusive towards their children as humanly possible when they need care, even if they are nice as pie to staff or paid help.

And no, putting a home in a trust actually makes it a countable asset. Rules and regs are complex enough and vary from state to state enough that elder law specialists can become a necessity just to negotiate a Medicaid spend down or find out what you can or can't spend money on. I sold my mom's home and we spent the money on her care, never needed Medicaid; she had a few extra years to live in it because I stepped in and managed her Medicaid denial for my Dad's care when she simply could not get the paperwork together for it; at the time I did not quite realize this was because she was having significant cognitive decline, and to be fair, the rules had gotten stricter than the first time that had to be done so he could get subacute rehab he needed several years prior.

If you nose around on here you will learn a lot. You will find some kids doing the opposite - trying to continue with an impossible caregiving burden without help to avoid spending down an estate, often with disastrous results to their own families and health. If you are concerned about having anything to leave to children when you pass on, and you need facility care for any length of time, there are really only two good ways to do it, and it may be too late for many people who would like to. One is to have life insurance with no "face" or cash value, and the other is to have really really good long-term care insurance.

I suppose the other point is that being paid for family caregiving is tricky - it can be done under certain circumstances but should be spelled out as a contract and well-documented - and a lot of people seem to judge that you should provide it for free out of love, even if it costs you a job or a home or all kinds of other travel expenses. Sorry your situation turned out so unsatisfactory for you!
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Your cousin will burn in Hell. Your aunt is waiting for you in a much better place. Read Matthew 5:10
On this site, we encourage caregivers to put a contract in place immediately, because those who wait for justice when the Will is read are sorely disappointed.
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You can use the money you get from reverse mortgage in any way you want. I've read from the reverse mortgage questions page of revmortgage/help/reverse-mortgage-faq/, that you can use it to pay for you health care or long term care expenses, home modifications and other debts. You don't need to pay anything until you move to another home or when you die. When this happens, your loan needs to be refinanced or else it will lead to foreclosure.

This is a good financial tool to pay your expenses but make sure you are updated in paying your property taxes, home insurance and other fees.
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