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Something that has helped is talking to her when she is in a good mood and will listen to reason. I just tell her that caregiving is stressful enough without her going against good advice and seeking not medical treatment, etc.
I have never treated my Mom like a "tall child" so I am constantly balancing her right to choose for herself with what is best for her long-term health.
good luck...let us know if you have found a better solution.
Lilli
The common thread among all seniors is that they are not happy about getting older and losing mobility and independence (who would be??) This resistance manifests itself in so many ways: withdrawal or giving up, uncontrolled anger, abusive language, resentment, etc.
Have you thought of narrowing his choices for him? ie: "Dad, you need medical attention. Would you rather go to the family doc or to the emergency room? No, there are no other choices; chose one."
It is so hard for caregivers to have the distance that most medical people have. I admire it in a way. They can be totally dispassionate about the people they care for because they know that emotion can get in the way. Unfortunately, we cannot have that distance.
Off the cuff, I would suggest doing what is best for his health...and ignore the silent treatment. He will get over the pouting...he may not get over a neglected illness.
good luck....
Lilli