Follow
Share

Greetings everyone, I'm new here and need some help with my dad's situation if at all possible. My dad is 70 years old and has MS. He used to live in a place with a caregiver but has been in a Texas Nursing home for over a year. He has Medicare and Disability SSI. He needs all around care and is in a wheelchair. I live in Wisconsin. Since there is no money at all I have not been able to see him or offer any assistance. Is there any kind of program out there that can transfer him to a home here in Wisconsin - it would be good for him and me if he could be here and that way I could visit him at least. He can't be on a plane and I have no way to get him. Part of his predicament is due to the fact that his granddaughter (from his other daughter) foolishly asked him to move in with her and her family with the promise of taking care of him. He also gave her his bank account info and asked her to pay his bills for him. She's bipolar and decided that she no longer wanted to take care of him. He was moved to a place with a caregiver but ended up in a nursing home due to a fall and has been there ever since, which was over a year ago. Since then as well my dad has found out that his credit has gone sour due to nonpayment of things and his bank account pretty much wiped clean with no more savings. All of his income goes to paying for his stay at the nursing home. I've tried in the past to get some help but to no avail. Any help with this is greatly appreciated.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
If you sincerely believe your father needs to be with you then save your money and move him. If he is being abused in your opinion then get Adult Protective Services involved. You refer to his granddaughter from another daughter as if this other daughter is not your sister....is there some family history here that you are not including in this situation that might shed some light on your feelings that you need to have him near you? If they have misused him, his trust, and/ or his money then APS will find out. In the meantime save your money if you are convinced he needs to be moved.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

call a Social worker see if she can setup a tranfer, you can go online and route a cheap bus fare at Megabus lot cheaper than Gray hound to go see him if he can ride bus either
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Get you attorney for the elderly, call elderly abuse and Aging for each state. It is going to take monthsfor transfer of your father stuff to get submitted. I am thanking the same way moving to Minnestota for a good job offer and bonus ,then come back in move my mother with me. The same good. Then I have to transfer my mother the same way.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I would say start with calling the Dept. of Aging in both states. See if there are volunteer organizations for driving someone or if you can afford to hire a driver. Not sure if this would be a 2 day drive. Any idea how many hours he could handle sitting in a car? Not sure if there is a train route or bus route. But these are the things I would look into. I'm guessing there are no other extended family members available who could do the driving. You would have to pay someone gas, food and lodging money to do this.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I have an aid with my Alz husband twice a week she is suppose to work 10-2. I have a camera and notice she leaves fifteen minutes early each time she is here. Last week she left 45 minutes early. I called her and told her I called and she was not there. Her answer was I was probably in the bathroom. I feel uncomfortable with her now but do not know if I should fire her before I hear from Medicaid which will probably be soon. As you know Alz people do not like change And he has gotten used to her but I feel I cannot trust her. Her job is to be with him and I feel she is stealing time . Should I fire her now or wait
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Panels - you are just going to have to do the work yourself to do this unless there is significant $$ that dad can spend for private gerontology services.The local AoA in your town and the AoA in his TX town can help you with some of the details but you are going to just have to be the boot on ground to get stuff done. For TX, all the AoA's are in the regional Council of Governments (COG's), there are like 15 regions in the state and they are very helpful but can move slow and nothing can be done in a couple of days. You can email the staff who work elderly & aging programs with your ? in advance too. Also I would contact the MS group in your area & in TX to see if there are any support services or volunteers to help dad out in the transition.

Does dad have the $$ for private pay for AL or NH or are you probably going to need to get dad qualified for Medicaid in order for him to get into a facility in Wisconsin? I'm assuming the Medicaid will be happening & my answers below are based on that.

here are likely the problems in doing that -
- he is currently a resident of TX & you are going to have to do whatever to establish & have him become a resident of Wisconsin. Medicaid - although a joint federal & state program - is managed by each state uniquely. The states have the program set up to take care of their residents first & foremost. Now you can from Wisconsin look into what you need to have him do this. If there is a bank group that is in TX and also in Wisconsin, I would suggest you go to TX and have him move his account to this bank group, then help him go-online to get his monthly income direct deposited to this new account. Back in Wisconsin, you want to get him an address in the state, if that is your address great but perhaps if there are debt issues, you might think of getting him a rental postal box (like at a UPS store or often these are business often are around college campuses), you will need to open it as they will require a DL to do this but you do this in your & dad's name. Get a magazine subscription or two in dad's name and get them going to this address. Then if he has any mail, you want to start getting all theses moved to his new Wisconsin address. The bank address change is the last one you will do.
- Medicaid for Wisconsin, you need to google your state program to see what their conditions are for income & assets. Tx has it at $ 2,163 per monthly income but maybe WS is lower. You need to make sure all is ok on that front.
- assets. Now if dad owns any real property in TX (land, home, cars) then they have to be sold before he can qualify for Wisconsin. They are exempt assets but only for the state of residence - understand? The proceeds for their sale has to be used only for his care or his needs too - the states all record sales and to the penny on all real property so eventually it will surface and you don't want this to be a problem
- now about the whole income stolen stuff. He will need to file a police report on this otherwise it will be viewed as gifting for Medicaid and he will be ineligible to get Medicaid for a # of day and the # will be dependent on just how much was taken. The police deal with this sort of issue all the time, you need to be there with him in TX when this gets done. I would suggest that instead of calling the general # for the po-po, instead you want to speak with whomever does the "community outreach" for the area where dad lives. If he needs Medicaid to ever pay for his care, he will need to get a police report on the theft done as otherwise it will be viewed as gifting and a transfer penalty imposed. If dad just won't do this, I'd go ahead and speak with the police on this to see if you can do the filing on the report as his next of kin or as his DPOA.
- you need to get a valid for Wisconsin law DPOA, MPOA etc for dad. The AoA in Wisconsin can likely give you elder law contacts for doing this. this site also has a drop down list of elder lawyers by state you can refer to too.
- start looking at facilities and bluntly ask about how they deal with younger residents (as opposed to the elderly w/dementia). Look to see what the residents are like. My mom's NH has a wing on the first floor that is totally younger residents - most are genetic issues who's parents are too elderly now to take care of them anymore (quite sad) or are severe trauma cases who now need skilled nursing. This wing seems to have more male nursing staff too (former military medics) as the residents are just bigger & heavier. It's the sort of thing that can make a big difference in having it work for everybody's best interest.

You know I think it;s unrealistic to think you can take him out of the NH in TX and drive him up to Wisconsin and just check him into another facility UNLESS you have 3 months of private pay available. he may need to live with you for a while till all is OK for him to clearly be a resident of Wisconsin. You are just going to have to plan this out and get down to TX perhaps in a couple of trips to get this done.

Also when you move him, try to get the day so that he is freshly refilled on all his medications. Most of the time, the NH does this in 30 - 90 day packs. You want to MAKE SURE that you get all these med's. Medicare will not pay for a second set or refills & replacing all this by private pay can be heart-attack expensive. Take zip locks and containers with fresh labels for this. Don;t leave without them!

Good luck and try to keep a sense of humor in all this.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

My dad was diagnosed with MS when I was 5 years old. Not only did I grow up with him dealing with it, I also used to work in medical field. The doctors I worked for saw many MS patients. However I haven't worked out in the field for some time now so I'm out of the loop with things. But I can say I know for certain that my dad would like it more if he was up here and had at least me to visit him. I just would very much be grateful if someone knows if there's some program out there that can help transfer him here. Thanks to anyone in advance. I know my dad would also be grateful.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

panels, please read up on MS. Later stages include neurological deficits. The patient will express a desire to be someplace else. That should not be interpreted as a need to move; it is a misplaced wish to escape MS, which is not possible.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Why would he be more isolated? He has MS not dementia. No one sees him there. If he was here I'd be able to visit with him at least. He has told me he would rather be here. Also I don't know the exact details of what transpired between his granddaughter and his bank account situation. What does someone who lives several states away with no access to any proof of that situation tell the police department exactly? The important thing is that my dad says he don't like it there and would rather be here - there's the problem with money and resources - we don't have it - is there any programs out there of any kind that could help us?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Unless he is the one wanting moved, I wouldn't do it. It is too big of change. Who is his POA?

If he needs to apply for Medicaid, there is a 5 year look back and the theft of his money is going to be discovered. (I would think.)
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Leave it alone. If you move him to Wisconsin, he would be more isolated and confused than ever. If someone has stolen his money, report it as a crime, offer no protection to someone who preys upon the elderly. Failure to do so is complicity and inexcusable.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.