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And not feel guilty because I am the only one he has to talk to? My Dad calls me up to 8 times a day. My Dad is almost 90 and he is living in an apartment complex thank provides his meals, cleaning and are there in the event of an emergency. I work and he calls me all the time to either read me his mail, read me a catalog he received or what he is watching on TV. I have a brother and two sisters, but they live in another state. I work and I guess he calls me all of the time because he is lonely but when he calls me it's always when I am the busiest. His timing is perfect. I try and play golf once a week and even if I tell him I am playing he stills calls me. So bad, that I leave my telephone in the car. I cannot be the only one out there with this so-called problem. Any suggestions?

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If you think he would be able to understand tell him you are no longer allowed to take personal calls when you are working and just don't answer the phone. i think he is just lonely and wants someone to talk to. May be it is time for him to move to a higher level of care.. Other than that and just ask if something is wrong then tell him cn't talk right now.
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Can either you or your father afford a paid "companion" for a few hours a day? The agency's that have caregiver can act in this capacity and also perhaps do some caregiver duties as well. When I had my mom get a caregiver - at first it was largely due to mom losing her drivers license and I couldn't run her all over creation doing her "errands" with her. It wasn't long before mom actually needed the help in many other areas and the caregiver was already in place to step up to the higher level of care. Mom became very attached to this lady - and for me, it took a significant amount off my plate. There are also adult daycare programs that provide activities for people like your dad - I don't have any real knowledge or experience with them but I'm sure someone else here could provide more details. Short of those two suggestions - you may just have to grow a thicker skin and put your phone on vibrate, condition yourself to listening to messages at a particular time of day and perhaps give your father a set time as to when you will give him a call back. I hate to say it but I doubt if you'll be able to just talk to him and ask him not to call as often - reasoning and remembering get tough at the point it sounds like your dad is at.
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I suppose it's possible that your father is forgetting your instructions about when to call. That may be why he calls so often. He may have forgotten that he called earlier on. I'd do a series of quizzes just to see if he does recall your previous phone conversations, just to rule out memory issues. My cousin, who was later diagnosed with dementia, started calling me a lot. At the time, I didn't know what was going on. But, it could be something else with your dad.

If it's not memory, then it may be that he is not able to resist the impulse to call you. Seniors often need that feedback and support. If that is the case, I'd make sure he knows how to call 911 for emergencies or get an emergency button and then let his call go to voice mail when you're the busiest. Explain in advance that you won't be able to take his calls, but you'll call him later.

Maybe, he's lonely and wants to chat. Can you arrange for a visitor to go to him or for him to attend some kind of senior events? Or, have you tried going to visit him for a couple of hours a week on your schedule and see if that helps?
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