My fiance's* 80-something year old grandfather, John Sr. has recently revealed to the family that he has a tumor on his liver, and the Dr's are estimating he has 2 years left. He's begun getting his affairs in order. His wife Lillian is about the same age he is, and has signs of dementia, so once he passes, she won't be able to live on her own. John Sr. believes she will go to live at the county nursing home and has begun giving his money to his sons so the county home "can't get at it" to pay for her care.
My thought is maybe there's another way. Like my fiance and our daughter could stay with her at her house, and help keep her safe. I'm a hopeless idealist and really don't have a clue what this would truly entail, so be gentle on me if I need some disillusioning! I just strongly feel that this woman, who has spent her life caring for her husband and family waiting on them hand and foot, deserves to live out the rest of her life at home. I'd like to figure out if I could make this possible. What sorts of resources are available to help with, say, keeping an eye on her while we're at work? It's feasible that there would be only three hours per day where one of us isn't home.
Clearly I've given this a little thought before, and the shock of learning about the grandfather's health condition needs to be processed before taking in an idea about what to do once he passes. Just, if this could be a viable alternative it seems like maybe it should be thrown out there sooner than later!
*Just to give a little context as to the nature of our relationship, my fiance and I have been together for the better part of the last 20 years. I'm a part of this family already.