I live out of state and visit her nursing home unannounced. This has happened before. They said they didn't wash her hair because she refused or that they don't want to dry out her scalp. My mom has diabetes and dementia, so I could believe she can be difficult. But this last visit, I found too many clues.
At spring visit I bought her super sized bottle of gentle shampoo and leave-in container. Also hypo-allergenic unscented moisturizer. This visit along with unwashed hair, she had ear wax accumulation on the outer ear. They did not have any Q-tips in supply, none in the house!
I spoke to the head nurse and they don't keep a log of bathing time. Shouldn't they record how often they bathe, wash their hair, report if there may be any new sores found on body, possible self hygiene fails...
I don't know the magnitude of the problem, I'm not there all the time. I ran out and purchased Qtips, cotton swabs and tea tree oil. She cleaned the insides of her own ears while supervised. I cleaned the outer with the oil. I also gently wiped away what I thought were age spots on her scalp. She also had scaly itchy spots on arms. Very dry skin on legs. I can tell that they don't apply the fungal oil on her toe nails like I asked them too.
What can I expect from the nursing home? What can I expect from the visiting nurses and physicians? I'm planning a meeting with each and want to be informed of my rights so that I don't come off as outraged as I feel. What else should I ask for, to create a checks and balances?
I also want to ask them to send me copies of laboratory results and visit summaries. Btw, I do have POA.
Thank in advance.