Follow
Share

I'm looking for productive suggestions on what I do about finding my mom with serious facial/neck scrapes and bruising and nobody will tell me what happened, Mom doesn't have access to her clothes and had new/ anti-slip socks on so I know somebody knows something, I saw her and have pics from 12 earlier. We've seen her Dr. to check her jaw because from the bruising you can see that wherever she fell, her jaw took the impact.


I understand that the CG's at moms MCF can't watch them 24/7 and accidents happen but I want to know if this is being documented. I have asked for the notes for my mom's care for the last week; I was told that it wasn't a hospital and they don't take notes like that. I explained that there must be some documentation on a daily basis of incidentals with patients, Medicine taken, whether they're eating, problems with incontinence (if not normal), when they're bathed etc.... Am I asking for too much? What do I do? I just want to know what happened to my mom, I'm starting to feel like they're hiding something. So many other things weren't taken care of that should of been in just that 1 day. I'm frustrated and quickly losing trust in them. If anybody has any input, I would appreciate it. Thanks in advance!

Find Care & Housing
Here you go:

https://ahca.myflorida.com/MCHQ/Field_Ops/CAU.shtml

Make a formal complaint and copy it to the Memory Care Unit.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to Countrymouse
Report

I didn't read all the replies, but those anti-slip socks are dangerous, in my opinion! If there is carpet, they can trip them. This happened to my mother BEFORE dementia set in. They are only effective on tile floors! They didn't fit my mother well, because the socks would stretch out and become loose, stick to the carpet and she would end up getting tripped by them. They may work for some people, but in the case of my mother, her feet were numb and she could only walk well if she had her shoes on.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Tiredandweary
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 5, 2020
Thanks for the information Tiredandweary, it is greatly appreciated! 8-)
I believe Knowledge is power to all lives but especially so for the lives and quality of life of our Loved Ones burdened with these devastating Memory illnesses like AD.
(1)
Report
See 1 more reply
"I was told that it wasn't a hospital and they don't take notes like that."

What?!

Long term care ombudsman, now.

I am with between four and ten different clients on a working day. In every one of those people's houses are our special folders - you quickly learn to spot them across a crowded kitchen, like you can smell 'em. In these folders are our care plans, plus Daily Notes sheets. Every visit must be logged: time of arrival, time of leaving, means of access. Every activity, recording what the client did and what you did. Every concern must not only be logged in the folder but reported back to the office and loaded into the main system. As far as is possible: if it happens, document it.

I'm not bragging - this is NORMAL. And a residential facility is trying to tell you that with their clients handily in the building 24/7, they don't keep care journals? WHAT???

I just can't believe it, on reflection. Who told you this? Have you taken it higher up the food chain?
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to Countrymouse
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 5, 2020
One of the Nurses told me that when I asked to see the last week of notes on my mom.
(0)
Report
See 1 more reply
I can’t imagine how this cannot be documented. Of course, you are not asking too much. You absolutely deserve to know.

I was a teacher and yes. mishaps occur, accidents, scuffles on the playground, etc. It was the teacher’s responsibility to record each situation in detail in an incident report.

I can’t see how the staff at a facility would be any different. Any attorney will tell you that incidents must be recorded, first of all family members have a right to know, secondly, if you don’t you are leaving the door wide open for lawsuits.

What to do? I would ask why a report wouldn’t be made?

I would place a camera in her room if your state law allows it. My state allows cameras in a facility but there are certain stipulations involved.

I would state that I would like to know exactly what happened to mom and that I wasn’t satisfied with their response to my inquiry.

Go to the highest level and keep talking. If you still don’t get a response you might shake them up by having an elder attorney write a letter advising them to report what occurred.

This is disturbing to hear. I am so very sorry about your mom’s incident and that they have not given you the information that you deserve to have. You deserve to feel secure about your mom’s living arrangements.

Best wishes to you and your mom.
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 5, 2020
Thanks NeedHelpWithMom! I appreciate your input and confirmation that I have been reasonable but, enough is enough! The last thing I want to do is cause a problem however, when they're actions/inactions on basic issues and they're refusal/inablilty to answer my questions in any manner are affecting my mom and myself in a negative manner; then I have no choice. Can they kick mom out if I file a complaint ?
(1)
Report
See 1 more reply
Are you able to place a discrete camera in the room? Some of them can be hidden in items and would not be noticed by most people. It might be very illuminating to see what happens when you are not there.
Ordinarily I would not recommend this, but it does seem that they are hiding something. Your mother's injuries could have been caused by a worker, another patient, or simply by tripping over something that can easily be removed for her future safety. No matter what the cause, you want to know.
Look on Amazon for nanny cam and hidden camera.
Another thought: If your mother is on medications for high blood pressure, her dosage might need to be adjusted downward. Nursing homes just keep on pumping in whatever drugs the doctor ordered, but the situation can change, making not as much medicine necessary. Although my "patient" had lost a good bit of weight, he was still taking the same dosage of coreg as before. One day his blood pressure plummeted to 79/ 56 and he almost passed out and fell when he walked. When the facility told me that they couldn't change his dosage without doctor's orders, and no doctor was available for several days, I called his regular doctor myself and had him send a new prescription.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to craftslady1
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 5, 2020
Thank you craftslady1! Mom has no high blood pressure meds and I still take her to her primary doctor of 15 years for everything. My brother and I have discussed putting a camera in her room, is it legal? We're still discussing it. Yes it would be enlightening for sure and I am there at least 1x (sometimes 2x) daily 6 days a week, brother takes 7th day.
(0)
Report
See 1 more reply
Floridagirl, because of the issues that are happening with caregivers and the administration can I recommend that you put all of your concerns in writing, forwarding a copy to corporate (if applicable) and a copy to the governing board.

This could very well be a jerk Executive Director that people are not willing to work for. Be sure and do a time line and state that you were happy with the care and the caregivers, be sure and explain how you have spoken to the administration and what you see has transpired. It is okay to state that you feel like you are being listened to in the moment but feel like nothing is being done to address the problems as they persist.

I think you are right, moving mom should be a last resort, but facilities can and are closed down for violations, these issues are the kind that can result in a shutdown. So have a plan B, just in case.

Hugs, not like this whole thing isn't hard enough we have to deal with greed that interferes with the ability to hire and retain good caregivers. You can do this!
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to Isthisrealyreal
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 4, 2020
Thank you for the great advice IsThisRealyReal!! Working on Plan B
(0)
Report
Just adding my 2 cents. It is a State law that injuries must be documented. Also, that a family member be called about that injury at the time it happened. If that is 3am, they must call. If they don't see the person fall, then they need to be sent to the hospital because there maybe a head injury involved.

I would talk to the Director of Nursing if u haven't already. Tell her you have been given the impression no incident report was written. You need to know what happened to Mom. Also, that you weren't called. See what she says and if getting the run around tell her ur are calling the Ombudsman. That you have been told State law requires an incident report be written and ur called. Be firm, but get the point across.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to JoAnn29
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 4, 2020
Thank you JoAnn29 I am thinking its time to call Ombudsman too, I am aware of several other patients that aren't being cared for adequately either.
(2)
Report
Wow, that is odd. If the bruising was so obvious, it concerns me why THEY were not more concerned with how this could've happened! And the fact that you've approached the admin. and were given a deflective answer. . . . It does seem suspicious.

I like what the other posters suggest - go with your gut on this. My mom's in a NH and there have been problems that go unexplained. I stay with it because it's close and I can be actively involved, and the positives outweigh the negatives. Admin and staff turnover can create havoc, so I try to be fair.

But your mom's case is different; they didn't call you, they deny any knowledge and won't provide documentation (was she examined immediately for injuries?), and they are weirdly hostile when you ask questions that any concerned person would ask. Maybe a talk with the ombudsman is needed.

Hope mom heals up nicely - I'll send some healing vibes her way :)
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to squee2000
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 4, 2020
Thank you squee2000, I too am close by and stay involved 6days a week, sometimes 2x a day and brother goes 1x day a week. I try and be fair, I know all CG's, employees and patients by name and realize a simple move may not be the answer, we may end up worse off somewhere else. I've really tried to be diplomatic but just feel nobody is being held accountable. When I was checking mom (with head nurse present) for bruising (the day I found the scrapes/brusing) at the facility; I noticed yellow on her legs, she gave me wet wipes and with 1 swipe of the back of each calf turn the wet wipe completely yellow /brown. The HN directed the staff in my presence to shower mom after dinner before bed. It was 5pm, I returned at 8:30 to find mom in her day clothes and the CG sees me and says "I was just going to get your mom, she the last one I have to put to bed" I said no she needs a shower, remember? Then she showed me how somebody had initialed they "Cleaned mom up" (maybe somebody cleaned her face and chin after she fell but, everything else was filthy) and proceeded to tell me how the day shift is lazy and then just sat there. Another great CG offered to shower her and I said I'll help you the other CG giver told me no,,, so OF COURSE I went straight in there and helped give my mom a shower and then blew her hair out. I would have thought she would of at least gotten up from her chair (with all the other patients in bed) and changed my moms filthy sheets while we showered and I blew dry her hair... but, I guess not. I had to request it. It was all about what the previous shift didn't do and how lazy they are according to 1 of the CGs- I don't care why it wasn't done (at that moment)I just wanted her cleaned and the sheets changed. Sorry I think I started venting... not my intention :)
(2)
Report
See 1 more reply
My mother has fallen 41x in her ALF and now MC, and each time I was personally called on the phone to discuss what had happened. Each fall SHOULD be documented, their care plan SHOULD be documented, and your gut instincts have to prevail here. Something sounds wrong; like she DID fall, they knew it, and put those socks on her to prevent it happening again.

Sounds like it's time to look for another MC home for your mom :(
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to lealonnie1
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 4, 2020
Thanks Lealonnie1 unfortunately you may be right but, it will be my last resort.... my thing is I know they are capable of caring for mom she's been there since August 2019, but they are really dropping the ball here of late and all my conversations with (director/head admin) are great but I don't have any more answers and moms not being cared for adequately... I've let a lot go by trying to be fair (they are short-handed) but I'm almost at my wits end and feel like Im getting stonewalled. so frustrating to see mom being disrespected or not cared for properly.
(0)
Report
Floridagirl6, so sorry your Mom is going through this. I remember going over to my parents house and my Mom would answer the door with bruises on one side of her face from where she apparently had fallen and hit a piece of furniture, or once again she and my Dad [both 90+] had fallen down the stairs.... [sigh] My Mom refused strangers in the house, and refused to move.

I am really surprised that the facility didn't give you a call, as when both my parents finally went into assistant living, I was the contact person, and every fall I was notified. I appreciated the calls, but I knew there wasn't a whole lot the facility could do to limit these falls as that was now the norm with my parents.

And there will be times when the Staff wouldn't know how a person had gotten bruised. I know for myself [a senior] I will find black/blue/green marks on myself not having a clue where they came from.... must have bumped into something and didn't think twice about it.

Oh, I found those non-skid socks are not good for seniors. I threw all of mine out years ago, because I noticed if I was walking on carpet and transferred to a wood surface or tile surface, the socks would come to a complete halt making me feel like I was being thrown forward. At that time I was still young enough to catch my balance.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to freqflyer
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 4, 2020
Thanks FreqFlyer! Mom fell in Dec, I found her outside on the cement bleeding and confused; it is my belief that she had just fallen. I called 911 and we went to hospital as she had lots of external injuries. She recovered quickly from the injuries she suffered but she is not a fall risk (or wasn't at that time), she's very mobile. So they didn't have a chance to call but have called us in the past to keep us informed when she wasn't feeling well (there was a gastrointestinal bug going around) and for other issues. So I was shocked when I saw her as I had spoken to the facility 2x the morning that I recently found her bruised and scratched.
(1)
Report
"if we weren't confident in them, they would understand if we wanted to move mom."

I'd be worried this is code for "in my opinion you should get your mom out of here ASAP". Staff can't come right out and tell you that there are ongoing problems that are affecting the quality of care (at least not while they are on the job), the perpetual staff shortages could point to larger issues.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to cwillie
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 4, 2020
Thank You Cwille. Yes, this was a very disturbing comment in my head as, I was only trying to bring things to their attention and asking questions about protocol to get resolutions.
(0)
Report
Our MC is VERY good about documenting and contacting us, and I would feel VERY UNCOMFORTABLE if they didn’t.

They were also extremely proactive about managing her space, arranging for physical and occupational therapy, and being sure her shoes and walker were being used consistently and correctly during the time when she was falling.

(Tapping wood) she hasn’t fallen in quite some time, I believe thanks to the many initiatives her MCU came up with.

I’d be “water on stone” on your mother’s situation, if I were you, asking if you could do anything to prevent another fall, providing alternative ways of communicating with you if she were to fall again, even perhaps another person who could be notified, any recommendations for balance therapy or any other sort of therapy that might be worth trying.

If you’re not content after what you consider a reasonable period of time, I guess your only choice is to start a search for someplace else.

No optimal choices really, but safety first hope her face heels well and soon.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to AnnReid
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 5, 2020
Thanks AnnReid! The MCF had been overall great (with a few issues but, they were addressed and resolved)for 1st 5 months -- however, the last 6-8 weeks the level of care has suffered; as they are under staffed and the new workers aren't all trained the same on patients (which I don't understand) An example, a new CG left pajamas out on moms bed with a pull-up for her to change herself into PJs, the problem is my mom hasn't been able to self dress since she moved in, she needs help with all hygiene and changing, she doesn't know what they're for but she has tried to put the top on like pants and almost fallen...Another example is she can't have any fish, just 3 weeks ago I was there and noticed they were having fish for lunch so I offered to give my mom her lunch, they handed me a plate with fish on it and I said mom doesn't eat fish.... The caregiver (who's not new but usually works in a different hall) had no idea...Moms lost 7 pounds in 1 month, so her missing 1 meal 1x week is something we don't want to happen if it can be avoided. My mom will not complain and say its because I don't eat the fish, she thinks that would be rude and just won't eat it. I know It's not the end of the world, but they should all know when someone can't have a certain food. It (a list of foods specific patients can't have is written on the inside of the cabinet door in kitchen) We pay over 5K a month so it's a nice facility, and I know they're capable of taking great care of mom; and I have tried to be patient and understanding but I feel like I keep addressing the same issues and they remain unresolved and then all the things that happened in last few days, specifically them not being able to even tell me my mom for sure fell when she obviously did. I'm at a loss of what else I can do to resolve these/any issues without some outside help.
(0)
Report
My mom has been falling a lot at memory care facility lately. I posted here just yesterday & others told me it’s not unusual. I do have to remind myself that she was already falling at home before the move, but other than a couple bumps & bruises - hasn’t done too much damage (<knock on wood>). I do think that with every fall she seems to become weaker & weaker - but maybe it’s really that she’s falling because she’s becoming weaker and weaker. She just got over a very bad cold & laryngitis - that knocked her for a loop as well, so that is a factor too.
We have a paid advocate who checks in on Mom occasionally along with our visits - so she has someone onsite visiting her 5-7 days a week, 2-4 hours each time. She also has a therapist to talk with each Monday morning. She doesn’t seem to remember most of these actual visits, but we do notice that her demeanor seems best when she has regular visits & we stay on somewhat of a schedule for her.
We do get calls when she falls, but there have been A couple of occasions when we find a new bruise that no one can explain. (New unexplained slip proof socks were on her feet once too.)
I wish this could be easier for our loved ones AND for those of us trying desperately to navigate through this with them. It’s so hard for both sides to accept that it won’t be getting any better or any easier - until it’s behind us.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to NanatoRandS
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 5, 2020
Thank You NanatoRandS Mom is very mobile and never fell until after being in Memory care for almost 6 months, I actually found her myself on the cement face down outside (a few months back), bleeding, with not a soul in sight so I called 911 and we went to hospital. I believe it had just happened; she had PT outside to work on strengthening her walking skills for 3 weeks. She recovered quickly and had been fine until I found her the other day with a few big scrapes and huge bruises on chin and down neck; and a few spots all on same side of body all but confirming there was a fall of some sort - 1 knee is scraped, arm has small bruise and same on her hand. I believe somebody knows at least where and about when she fell but I have not been able to find out who, which makes me suspicious that they are hiding something.
(0)
Report
You need to contact your local area on aging and the ombudsman.

Yes, they are required to document injuries, meds and such. This is a clear sign that something is very wrong.

When you contact your area on aging tell them that you need help asap because your mom has sustained substantial injuries and it appears that the facility is hiding something, whatever that is whether lack of care, aggressive treatment from caregivers or??? Be sure and tell them that you were told that they don't document anything.

You should start looking for a new facility, this is the kind of issues that will get a facility shut down.

I am sorry that your mom is being treated like she doesn't matter.
Helpful Answer (5)
Reply to Isthisrealyreal
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 4, 2020
Thank You IsThisRealyreal! The thing is I know they're capable of taking good care of all the patients at the facility because moms been there since last August 16th and they've done a great job for the most part - but, lately they are short handed (14:1 Caregiver to Patient Ratio many times)and really dropping the ball. The last thing I want to do is move mom but that will be last resort. I just feel like everytime I talk to head nurse or Director, they listen but nothing is changing. Director responded to me on more than 1 occasion that "if we weren't confident in them, they would understand if we wanted to move mom." WHAT???? I was just trying to convey issues that are coming up about moms care or lack thereof. Makes me think they're hiding something.
(1)
Report
This should have been documented.  Agree, of course there will be falls, but the lack of documentation is problematic in my mind.  Is this a nursing home, ALF, Independent living, small care and board?
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to FloridaDD
Report
Floridagirl6 Mar 4, 2020
She lives in a Memory Care Facility.
(0)
Report
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter