I am a 24 year old college student who cares for her grandparents,ages 81(mobility issues,deafness,diabetes) and 84(3x a week dialysis) with my mother.(Mother is the baby of 5 children,I am the only one of 3 grandchildren to help. Her siblings all live within the area.) I do not live with them, rather my aunt who is a registered nurse does. My aunt works W TR,F, and Sat with Su,M,T, days off. My mother and I are trying to manage our house, while I attend school full time and my mother works 40 hours a week. On Sunday, my mom and I went to a movie for the first time in months,knowing that my aunt was off. We left out ingredients to make their dinner. Just as the movie ends,our phones ring and it is my grandfather demanding dinner claiming my aunt had to work. We were confused and upset with my aunt,but left to make dinner. We get there and my mom has spoken to my aunt who said she had to work overtime and we could make dinner as usual. Neither of us liked how she spoke but made dinner anyway. My aunt calls my grandfather and tattles on us.My grandfather sided with my aunt and did not even hear our side. My grandfather, in return,tells us both to go,that we are tired and if he needs us,he'll call. We were both told to just go and get out.Today, my mother was told by both of her parents to get out and do not come back. I was told by my grandmother and aunt that they were fine and to go on and get it,before I could even get out of my truck to check on my grandfather as my mom had asked me to. My mother's gone without pay 5 times, I've lost paying jobs as a childcare provider,both of us have been depressed and suicidal(we're on medication now and are better),my mother and stepfather are on the brink of divorce because of the infidelity that arose because of the caregiving,and now after almost 6 years when we have been with both of them(my grandfather more so) at the brink of death,we're told get out because of my aunt's lies and not wanting to do her part. We are so upset, yet we know that my aunt will feed my grandfather everything he should not have and will kill him. What can I do? How do I help? I cannot call the state aging commission where we live unless there is neglect or abuse.
I feel horrible watching my mother cry. My whole family is torn apart and I don't know what to do other than be angry and cry.