I am a 50 year old stay at home Mother of two boys 18 and 11. My mother suffers from a degenerative spinal disease that is very painful and limits her mobility greatly. she is currently on morpheme. My Father is also very limited with knee problems and arthritis. Since my family's recent financial problems, my Dad proposed to pay me to help my Mom, so my Dad could go out to play golf, and meet with friends. He has long term care insurance, but said he would rather pay me tan a stranger. This all sounds so neat and tidy, such a great deal! I have never felt so trapped, guilty and obligated in my life! Nothing I do is good enough , done with enough great fullness, or love, or respect. I walk on eggshells constantly, trying to comply with my Mothers impossibly structured demands. my Father cannot keep up with her either, and has to put up with her constantly berating him that he is not fast enough.
Recently, I made a huge mistake, I responded with what she construed to be a frustrated response, she began to cry, as she does, and flew into a self putting rage. I snapped. I yelled right back... Horrible. In her rage, she proceeded to tell me how selfish I was, how I was only helping for the money and how even my Father thinks I am not caring enough. When she calmed down, she said she would not tell my dad, because it would kill him,but when I called in the morning, he was very cold and terse with me. I'm sure she told him I have lived with this for years. They are scared, negative elf entered people who never trust anyone, have always used money to manipulate mine and my brothers behavior. My oldest brother committed suicide, and they were mostly concerned with making sure everyone knew it was not their fault. They are always telling me I am their primary heir to keep me in line, they hate my husband and suggest I Divorce him and move in with them with11 year old.
Please believe me when I say I don't care about the money! I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown! I have always tried to honor my parents because I know they have no clue they are like this, but I cannot live like this anymore!