Her trust states that when she can no longer care for herself, my brother and I have joint DPOA. She is still driving, taking care of her banking account, etc. We are noticing changes in her appearance, house keeping, etc. She has began driving to her bank (15 miles away) each day getting a print out of her account. We are afraid that she will be the next "silver alert". She lives two hours from me. My question--The attorney who wrote her trust has passed away. Is there an advantage to getting an attorney in the county she lives in verses one two or three hours away? Would it save us money? We live in Oklahoma. I know she will probably not sign the POA over. In that case it states that her doctor and attorney will make the decision. I dread this knowing that trying to get poa and taking the driving away plus making her move in or close to one of us is a triple threat to her independence. Does anyone have an idea on how you go about this and not be the "bad guy"? Do you ask the doctor to do it for you (if he agrees)? Her excuse for not moving close to one of us is that her house has not sold, (it has been on the market 2 years). She has it overpriced by (100000.00), another example of poor judgement. I have began to see a little paranoia as far as my brother and I are concerned. When we have ask her to move closer she sometimes replies "your just want to put me in the nursing home and take my money". I guess that is why I tend to think if someone else tells her she has to move she won't be as likely to think that we don't have her best interest at heart. Am I correct in saying that our first step in this process is to find an attorney and
discuss this before we approach her?