I cannot find a place to take my husband. He has dementia. He hallucinations and is paranoid. Plus aggressive and sexually aggressive. Was in memory care sent to ER then sent to Psychiatric hospital. It’s been three weeks and they still say he is unstable. I’ve called a lot of skilled nursing facilities. No one wants him. I am so frustrated. As soon as they read the clinics notes they say NO. What to do??? This can’t be first case ever
Anyone have any ideas?
Also I agree with the others about making it clear he can’t come home. Rather than calling around for living facilities, you might try contacting your state’s teaching hospitals if they have memory clinics. Sometimes memory clinics have support staff who can connect you with targeted support resources to help you while the social workers at the hospital helps him.
You’re right, this is not a unique situation, but in too many places there are too few options. Sending you mental support and a giant box of emotional chocolates.
And it is on the hospital social workers to find placement.
He will require medication, likely more heavy than you would wish for.
I would stay as "out of this" as you are able.
Make it clear that you cannot take him in under any circumstances and that you fear him.
If you must, give up POA and put this in the hands of state guardianship, see an attorney for separation legally and division of assets. This isn't going away. This will be getting worse. And I pity the poor social worker stuck with this, but stuck he/she is.
I am so sorry, and I hope you will update us. This isn't yours to solve really because I doubt you would ever be able to.
This happens often with psych patients. NHs will refuse admission if behaviors can affect the safety of other patients. Some people like your husband may have to stay in a psych facility. All too often, there are only a few per state. There may be a wit list or he may be relocated far away from home.
Finding a special place is the job of the facility. Your calling around is futile.