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I have been caring for my mother since her stroke 5 years ago; she had a second one Easter of 2016. She is max assist, as she cannot stand nor take care of her hygine. Sometimes, she needs help eating. Her dementia has been worsening greatly, to the point that it is becoming even more difficult for me and my part-time aide to care for her. I promised her that I would keep her at home as long as I can. I just don't know how much longer that will be. I have been looking into long term care so that I'm not faced with needing to make a sudden decision. Due to her conditions, she need both skilled and memory care. I have contacted a few places. Unfortunately, those who provide memory care state that they do not provide skilled care. I am at a loss as to what to do. Am I to simply ignore her mental/emotional needs brought on by her dementia in order to have her physical needs met? I am beyond frustrated. Suggestions and guidance will be appreciated.

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If you are looking at memory care because you think it would be superior to NH in providing stimulating activities for those with dementia that is no necessarily true, many nursing homes provide activities suitable for those with dementia, and many memory care AL's do nothing more for their residents than lock the doors to prevent wandering.
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This is a very trying part of finding care - most memory care is housed in assisted living facilities which do not provide by terms of their license skilled nursing as some don't even have LVNs staffed 24/7

Mom's memory care cannot do IVs snd so if a resident needs fluids or antibiotics they must be sent out to hospital and then to a nursing home - some return and some don't

If you cannot get more help in home, then you will need to look at nursing homes - the other other alternative might be a residential board and care but those too may not be able to handle her needs

Try contacting your local area agency on aging and getting a social worker to do a needs assessment and provide you with some options
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