Follow
Share

Mom is 84 yrs old with Dementia. Lives in Live Oak, alone, but brother lives next door. ( I live in Tampa) She is no longer able to clean her home (mentally cannot focus on task or remember what she was going to do or even recognize her home is a mess). She feels left out from things, my dad and her have been divorced for 24 years and she feels that she should be invitedone when his mother and him plan gatherings. Only interested in kitchen, bathrooms, and floors. Laundry would be great but not required for this inquiry. Her only income is her Social Security each month.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Thanks to everyone who took the time to provide input to my question. I will do more research for the best alternative for her. And for those who thought of the obvious...why can"t my brother do it.....he has for the last 3 years since my Dad died but has just had major neck surgery with multiple fusions and is in recovery for that and is facing knee replacement surgery as soon as he is able. I do appreciate all the input!
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

BTW, a knowledgeable family member should attend the needs assessment interview! Seniors tend to exaggerate what they can do. The assessors understand this but have to record the answers they are given. So if Mom says, "Of course I can clean my own floors!" you can gently remind her that she used to be an excellent housekeeper but that she hasn't been able to push the vacuum since her last fall, etc.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

We got my mother housekeeping assistance by calling her county's human services department and asking for a needs assessment. She easily qualified for Medicaid since she had low SS income and no assets. She got house cleaning and laundry help. As her needs increased so did the Medicaid help. She is now in a nursing home.

I would start that way. See what she is eligible for and how to apply to get it. Since she is moving but staying in the same state the Medicaid would be valid at both locations. When the house sells she will be expected to use the proceeds for her own care so she would be off of Medicaid while she spends her own funds and could re-apply when the funds run out.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

There are multiple offices for the Area Agency on Aging which operates with Dept of Elder Affairs.
http://elderaffairs.state.fl.us/doea/arc.php - You can find which area your mother lives in and check with them to see what she qualifies for. There are programs, but most require demonstrated financial need or assistance requirements documented by medical professional. Just heads up.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

freqflyer writes: "CharHoit, it would be nice if your brother could do those chores." Exactly what I thought! Of course the daughter would be expected to do those chores -- why not the son???
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

The Florida Department of Elder Affairs may be helpful. They have a website. I would seek legal advice if you plan to sell her house though. If she is planning to apply for Medicaid, they will consider her income and assets. Her house may be an exemption, but cash treated differently. If she has funds from the sell of her home, it might be a problem. There are so many rules about how that works, I'd get legal advice from an Elder Care attorney in your jurisdiction, especially, before I sold the house.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

CharHoit, it would be nice if your brother could do those chores. Otherwise your Mom would need to qualify for Florida Medicaid, and hopefully her State has some type of free housekeeping to help her.... but note, Medicaid can become complicated since your Mom still owns a house that has equity.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I just spent 10 days in her home. The only thing we need help with at this time is the house cleaning. We have put Mom's home on the market and she (and my brother) will be moving to Tampa once it sells. So again my question is: How do I find out if my mom qualifies for assistance with housekeeping? Thanks.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

If she's having trouble recognizing the condition of her home and is unable to focus, then I would be curious as to her ability to function in other areas. Would she be able to focus on a hot stove or hot water? Would she be able to get out of house in case of fire? Does she recognize that eating spoiled food is dangerous? Would she realize the danger of letting a stranger in the house? There are so many risks associated with her condition as it progresses.

I might go and stay with her in her home for a couple of days and get a true picture of what is going on. Except for the early stages, it's very risky to live a dementia patient alone in a house, even with a brother next door. Is it possible for her brother to move in or her move in with him?

You could also retain an professional person to assess her needs. They can go into he home and determine the areas that she needs help with, but I still think that input from the family is helpful. That's why it's vital that you know exactly what her deficits are and not just what she tells you.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.