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My Mom (84+) is completely independent but as my sister and I live far away. She is not too keen on the idea as she doesn't like strangers in her house. But we would have more peace of mind knowing that someone can check in on her regularly and keep us informed.

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I'll be a little difficult at first but you need to get a home health care CNA. There are cna's in the phone book and many of them can help you but it would be less expensive if you found one on your own. Get nanny cams installed in your home before you hire a stranger to avoid anything happening to your mother. Check with the next door neighbor and see if you can make a deal with her or someone in the family who would like to work for you. Medicare should reimburse you for help you pay for in your home. Save receipts for them. Research anyone you want to hire with the better business bureau or police and see if there have been any claims of abuse against them. Check references as well. good luck in finding one.
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Home Instead Senior Care would be a great resource for you..unlike a website located in England.
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i had the same issue with my mother refusing to let anyone into her home that she did not know, using the site we found carers for ourselves which meant that my mother could be involved in choosing who cared for her. shes been with us for 3 years needless to say my mother is extremely happy with the outcome.
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Hey there I would check out homecarework.couk , I posted my advert for free, i had the same issue with my mother refusing to let anyone into her home that she did not know, using the site we found carers for ourselves which meant that my mother could be involved in choosing who cared for her. shes been with us for 3 years needless to say my mother is extremely happy with the outcome.
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Marcy, if your Mom is agreeable to have someone in the house, and that person will be paid, here is a sample employment agreement to use. This will come in handy later down the road if for some reason your Mom would need to go onto Medicaid. Medicaid looks back 5 years to see how your Mom's money was spent.

https://www.agingcare.com/documents/personal_care_agreement_AgingCare.pdf
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Like freqflyer said, you first need to get your mom to agree to having someone come in to check on her several times a week.

Then with your sister, figure out when you'd want this person to come in. Mornings? Afternoons? Right before bed? And for how long? 2 hours? 4 hours? 6 hours? Etc. This would all depend upon your mom's current state of health, what she might need assistance for, and what she might be willing to agree to. If you can only get her to agree to, say, 2 hours a day, take it! You can always increase hours as needed.

I know you said you don't live in the area but if your mom is willing to concede to having a caregiver it might help if you or your sister is there with her the first couple of times. A professional caregiver will understand your mom's hesitance at having her there and might just take the bull by the horns and start doing what needs to be done (encouraging your mom to shower, making her breakfast) but you may get a caregiver who will need a little more direction from you as to what your mom's needs are. Many elderly people left alone with a caregiver will politely ask them to leave by stating that they don't need assistance. The caregiver will have little choice but to leave since no one can be forced to have a caregiver if they're competent and can make their own decisions.

If you can get your mom to agree include her in the decision making process. Would mom like help with getting her groceries? If so, that's something some caregivers will do. And while caregivers aren't allowed to fill medication boxes they can remind your mom to take her medication. Does your mom need help in that area?

But first you have to get your mom on board.
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Marcy, if your Mom doesn't like strangers in her house it would be difficult for you to bring in a caregiver.... I ran into that with my own Mom.... oh my gosh, after three days Mom told the caregivers to leave. But then again my parents were in their 90's and Mom was in denial that she was aging and needed help.

Check with your local council on aging to see what recommendations they would have for assistance. https://www.agingcare.com/local/Area-Agency-on-Aging

For my parents I went through an Agency that does senior caregiving. But I wasn't going to pay for it myself, thus my Dad was going to reimburse me for the cost. This shouldn't come out of your savings.
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