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Hi there, I'm new to this site and look forward to communicating with many of you. My mother and I have been caregivers to her mother/my grandmother for several years now. Around two months ago, she was designated as an in home hospice patient. She has already had several "rallies" of strength, always followed the next day by a marked decline in waking hours and energy. However, yesterday's rally was much more active than we have noticed in the past. She is typically wheelchair/bed/chair bound, and does not toilet without our assistance. In fact, for the past two weeks, we have been using a bed side commode at all times because she is too weak to safely transfer herself to the toilet or walk into the bathroom. Yesterday, she insisted on using the real toilet, and even stood at the sink to brush her teeth (with assistance and supervision). While my mother was fixing dinner and I was out running errands, she even stood and walked WITHOUT HER WALKER, which she has been unable to do since 2013, into the bathroom and back. Obviously, this gave us all a scare, but it can be impossible to supervise someone directly for 48 hours, even with 2 people. Anyways, today, she could barely get out of bed in the morning, slept all morning in a rocking chair, and even had an instance of fecal incontinence. She could not feed herself, and refused all but applesauce. We are worried that this is the final rally. What is your experience in this situation? Thanks.

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The hospice caregiver who watched over a family friend calls what you're describing a "miracle day". She told me that almost all of her patients have one or several toward the end.

My mom did as well. And I'm soo thankful! A few days before she passed, she was suddenly hankering for her fave food -- a Portillo's hotdog with everything. She ate the sole thing! Along with chocolate pudding. Yummy! She said.

The next night she passed quietly in her sleep.
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When my Dad passed he had been in bed in a semi coma for 3 days, then died quietly. Prior he did exactly what your grandmom is doing. Sometimes I doubted if this was the end. Just enjoy everyday, fill every whim, it will be soon. My heart goes out to you.
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Marisainmich, your mother sounds like my mom. I have noticed that she can do a little for herself if no one is within her sight to do it for her or help her. However, she does follow a busy day with a weak day. We did a lot today, I got her up earlier than usual and we ran errands and went shopping some. Tomorrow she probably will rest in bed most of the day. That's her pattern.
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Marisainmmich I can tell you that my Mom had bouts of activeness and alertness and then the next day she was the exact opposite.

I think the energy it takes to do things, even simple things like brushing your teeth, walking to the bathroom, getting dressed for elderly people is like if we suddenly did a workout when we had not worked out in a while.

Thats what I think anyways. I used to get real excited when my Mom would perk up and do things but it got to the point when I'd prepare myself for her being excessively exhausted the day after. It became like a pattern.

This is my experience. Hope it helped.
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