Follow
Share

I am taking care of my father full time now. I brought him home from the nursing home so he could be happy around his loved ones. Recently, One of my sisters called his phone and really yelled at him and got him upset and depressed. He now does a lot of crying and I want to know if i can file an order of protection to stop all of this. I hate seeing him upset because of her selfishness. He had a stroke a year ago and i just want him to live a happy stress free life.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Inman, it sounds like the situation is dire and may require you to take whatever action is necessary to secure your father's peace of mind. If keeping your family away ensures a more tranquil, stress-free environment for your dad, and for you, follow your heart and do what your must.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Maria, hello from another from NC! :)
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Inman, I understand what you are going thru. I have guardianship of my mom and am currently being harassed by my own brother. He is upset because he can't have any contact with me or my mother, but its his own fault, because during the guardianship process, he deceitfully tricked my mom into signing over her car to him at the DMV, then made an extra set of car keys, got the car to his house, drove it for a month, and then purposely wrecked the car so I wouldn't get it. Because of all his shenanigans, the state of NC filed felony charges against him (he wasn't supposed to trick my mom into signing anything because she had been rendered incompetent by the court, I was the temporary guardian at the time and was the only one who could sign any documents in my mom's name, and social services was still involved with my mom). He was found guilty of Obtaining Property Under False Pretenses, and Exploitation of an Incompetent Adult, and gained two class H felonies that will follow him for the rest of his life (he is 56 years old and I am 36). Due to the felonies, he cannot have any contact of ANY kind with my mom or me (because I am her guardian and he has harassed me) or he will go to jail--and it's a lifetime ban. He's constantly harassed me through other people and also followed me when I have been with other relatives. I called my phone company and blocked his phone number from calling my house (just can't block his cell phone number). With all of this being said, please call your phone company and block the phone numbers that are harassing you--before it gets your father even more upset and he ends up in the hospital. I am speaking from experience because everything I have gone thru has now caused my mom's dementia to get way out of hand---to the point where I am now having to get her admitted permanently to a nursing home. All this drama has caused my mom to get into anger rages and she will refuse to eat, sleep, or bathe. I can no longer go on like this and had to get social services involved again to help me because my mom is now a danger to herself and me as well--all because of "family" members calling and creating chaos in my own home. So, please call your phone company and block those phone numbers. You and your dad need peace in your home. Your dad also needs to be able to live out the rest of whatever days he has left in a calm and stress-free environment. My prayers are with you.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Inman, I understand what you are going thru. I have guardianship of my mom and am currently being harassed by my own brother. He is upset because he can't have any contact with me or my mother, but its his own fault, because during the guardianship process, he deceitfully tricked my mom into signing over her car to him at the DMV, then made an extra set of car keys, got the car to his house, drove it for a month, and then purposely wrecked the car so I wouldn't get it. Because of all his shenanigans, the state of NC filed felony charges against him (he wasn't supposed to trick my mom into signing anything because she had been rendered incompetent by the court, I was the temporary guardian at the time and was the only one who could sign any documents in my mom's name, and social services was still involved with my mom). He was found guilty of Obtaining Property Under False Pretenses, and Exploitation of an Incompetent Adult, and gained two class H felonies that will follow him for the rest of his life (he is 56 years old and I am 36). Due to the felonies, he cannot have any contact of ANY kind with my mom or me (because I am her guardian and he has harassed me) or he will go to jail--and it's a lifetime ban. He's constantly harassed me through other people and also followed me when I have been with other relatives. I called my phone company and blocked his phone number from calling my house (just can't block his cell phone number). With all of this being said, please call your phone company and block the phone numbers that are harassing you--before it gets your father even more upset and he ends up in the hospital. I am speaking from experience because everything I have gone thru has now caused my mom's dementia to get way out of hand---to the point where I am now having to get her admitted permanently to a nursing home. All this drama has caused my mom to get into anger rages and she will refuse to eat, sleep, or bathe. I can no longer go on like this and had to get social services involved again to help me because my mom is now a danger to herself and me as well--all because of "family" members calling and creating chaos in my own home. So, please call your phone company and block those phone numbers. You and your dad need peace in your home. Your dad also needs to be able to live out the rest of whatever days he has left in a calm and stress-free environment. My prayers are with you.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Don't second guess your self. If a talk with your sister doesn't get the desired results, block her calls with your Dad's permission. Maybe getting hospice in the picture, would help your Dad gain peace with his past actions. Certainly an anti-depressant might help the crying.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I have tried to have talk's with her. Sadly our family is somewhat divided. They all have a different mother than i do so they hate the fact that i am the one taking care of him. Yet with that being said NONE of the other kids come to take care of him at all. Not even to give me a break. They always find something to complain about and get on dad about. It is to the point where i just can not take seeing them upset him much more. If i speak up about it then my uncles and aunts take their side saying that i should not tell them to stop. I am just unsure on what to do about it all.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Your sister should not be yelling at your father, that's for sure. Have you talked to your sister about her concerns? Have you asked her why events that took place 30 years ago are important enough for her to raise them with your father now?

I cared for my father when he was in agony, dying from pancreatic cancer. I was at his bedside at the hospital 24/7. My mom really relied on me to manage his care while she went to work each day. She had major problems coming to grips with the sudden diagnosis. My siblings came when they could.

The experience took a lot out of me. And I still have my moments regarding this devastating event, even though my father passed away over 20 years ago.

So I wouldn't discount the events raised by your sister. I'd try to understand her concerns. That said yelling at your father is unacceptable.

Perhaps you can have a heart to heart with her. Perhaps you can find out why she's upset about your dad making you his attorney-in-fact. POAs basically have a great deal of power over the person who places their lives in the assigned agent's hands.

So before you cut her off, get to the bottom of her concerns to see if cutting her off is the really the only choice you have.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Change his number and if she shows up at the house take out a restraining order.. You are the good daughter don't ever forget that!! He needs you to protect him...
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

She is mainly yelling at him because he did not make her his POA. Then she is yelling at him over events that took place 30 years ago.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Because she is family, I would want to know why she did it. If she is unstable or just cruel, certainly block her.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Get him a new phone and a new phone number. If she calls, let her call YOU at the house. If you think she should talk to your dad, fine. If not, too damn bad. If she starts any screeching, hang up. The end. You don't have to deal with this. Period. I wouldn't.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Dear Inman, If you have POA, I believe you would be within your rights to barr your sister from communicating with your father. It's your home and you could deny her visitation. They seem like drastic options, but if you cannot have a heart to heart talk with her and gain her cooperation, you may have no other choice. Otherwise, you could try removing the phone from his room, so you can screen all incoming calls. Or, you could block her phone # from his phone. I hope she will change her tune, so you don't have to resort to drastic measures. Good luck.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.