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To be honest, the first couple of years, I felt very suicidal. The stress was becoming too overwhelming. After a lot of prayer, I finally got myself together but still feel the need for anti stress medicine or something. I asked my doctor, at that time, if he would prescribe something for me. I explained my situation to him and his response was to get rid of my mother...no help. Any advice anyone?

P.S. No help from any other family members since day one.

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Jeannegibbs, I am glad to see your answer for anyone who reads this. I was fortunate enough to have a family doctor who listened to me and referred me to a psychiatrist. The combination of the medication, talk therapy, and a support group saved my sanity and maybe my life. I learned that I could visit and enjoy my mom, but to set boundaries and have time for myself. I know of friends who are prescribed antidepressants by a general practitioner, with no other therapy. Raisin 2012, I would never return to the doctor who said that to you! You need a specialist, who will monitor your medication closely, and recommend a therapist. I think most psychiatrists have colleagues for talk therapy. I am glad you reached out to others here and realized the absurdity of what you were told by the incompetent doctor! Hang in there. I am proof that you can regain your mental balance and get through this difficult time. Good luck and keep us posted on your progress.
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Moving mom out is not a guaranteed cure for depression. Finding a decent, caring, thoughtful physician who asks your entire personal and family history of depression and your current symptoms and thoughts. followed by referrral for cognitive behavioral therapy and an Rx for an SSRI is not a guarantee either but it might be just what you need.
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Speak to a psychiatrist, not a doctor. Care for your parent, but save yourself. Use a facility when the time comes knowing you did your best and visit them frequently. My father has passed. I miss him everyday. I can live knowing I did my best for him until the end. They get very needy sometimes, but it both both part of being a baby, then part of going old. Take care of yourself first, without guilt or there is nothing left to give others.
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Thank you jeannegibbs. Your post was quite comforting.
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Try to find a caregiving support group; some hospitals support them as do some AL or IL facilities.
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And sometimes there are mental health care facilities that only charge on a sliding scale... according to what you can pay.... I am so sorry that Dr. dismissed you like he did....If you feel you are that depressed then please get some help....

I am very glad you posted here, we hope to see you again... and hopefully you will understand many of us are on anti's and it helps to know you are not alone
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If you have felt suicidal and you know you are depressed, please change doctors! That was NOT a helpful or caring response. In fact, it was stupid.

You are saying "I have a situation I can't handle and I am depressed." The doc answers "Go handle your situation." Grrrrrr

Find a local mental health clinic that accepts your insurance. Make an appointment. It depends on the cause and the circumstances, but often depression is treated with a combination of medication and talk therapy. It makes sense (I learned the hard way) to get your body chemicals back into better balance so that you are better able to handle the talk therapy. Both together is the key!

As I'm sure you know, antidepressants aren't a "happy pill" that will salve all your problems. They just give you back "you" -- sometimes happy and sometimes sad, but not overwhelmed to the point of inaction.

As you become more emotionally stable, you will be better able to handle taking care of yourself. As the other posters have suggested, exercise, including walking, is very helpful. So is getting enough sleep. Eating right helps. And addressing the source of your stress is critical. But, one step at a time. Go to a mental health clinic. Get on a drug. (It may take more than one try to find the best one for you.) Get into therapy.

When you are getting that kind of help and support and are more your own confident self, you will be better able to address the issues about caring for Mom. Who knows, you may even decide she needs to be in a care center. Or maybe not. But the doctor's off-hand remark to get rid of your mother is NOT helpful.

Go to a professional who really understands depression. Take care of you first.
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I agree with bamboo, do some exercise if you can, something as simple as walking around the block can be helpful.... who knows you might bump into another Caregiver doing the same thing. If you aren't comfortable leaving the house, grab a lawn chair and sit in the sun for a few minutes.
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Don't expect your mood will improve dramatically after taking anti depressant medicine. You still have to control it yourself.
Taking care of the elderly can be really stressful, but you have to have your own time. Go out and do some exercise everyday or go shopping with friends will help. If your mom is unreasonable, try to ignore or go away for a while.
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