Hoping that I would be able to get a break soon. Have been waking up more and more achy and tired of running on low. Feeling inadequate when it comes to caring for my grandma. When I ask for one day off my mom (grandma's daughter) will usually text me in a panic asking if I'd be home. Is it really that hard to take care of someone? Yes. Ok lemme rephrase that question, would you really want to spend 24/7 taking care of someone who is forgetting how to do normal things and can't properly care for herself? I have been a "built in nanny" since my first brother was born when I was 8 so my grandma has purpose again after my grandpa died. I learned way too much about how to care for kids at a young age. I struggled in school but was because I suffer from bipolar disorder and generalized anxiety. I am the eldest of 3 half brothers from my mom and step dad. My parents both work full time and sometimes overtime so we have been hard working middle class for all my life. Living comfortorble for being second generation Mexican Americans. My parents obsession with work life and now suffering mid life crisis I'm struggling with trying to tell my mom that it's a lot for me. Every time I say I can't do it (I've helped with both households pretty much went to back to school night and helped with hmwk for the entirety of my brother's school yr.) I'm known at their school as their mom.... and they have met their actual mom😓 I have moved back into my childhood home (grandma's house) ultimately to get away from family (tensions ran high between parents and I because of my bipolar depression and and my grandma had emergency bypass and heart valve replacement. So it was convenient. Had been working part time since 2014 but since my grandma's last stroke a month ago I stopped calling work and they stopped calling me the night it happened. Im 27 years old and I really love my grandma and miss my grandpa dearly. But there are days where I just want to shut myself out and cry myself into oblivion.