My husband and I are taking care of my 93 year old mother in law. She still lives in her own home but requires a lot of time from us, especially from my husband. Part of the problem I have is that she will not coorperate with us. She still insists she can drive, even though she had an accident earlier this year and her insurance rates have increased $1000 (not to mention that she is no longer safe). My husband has been talking to her almost daily about giving up driving, sometimes she agrees, other times it's like she's a little girl with a "you can't tell me what to do" attitude. She has that attitude a lot, it seems to be part of her basic personality. She seems to have no concept of time, and calls us at all hours of the day/night about nonsense things. She will not consider a hearing aid, in home care, meals-on-wheels, nothing that would help her and give us a bit of a break. We finally got her to agree to a Life Alert, but she does not wear it much. And she is becoming more confused and refuses to listen. So she repeats the same thing over and over, asking the same questions as if she's fixating on a subject (like driving). Plus she is so miserable, lonely and depressed because everyone she knows is already gone. I feel really bad and selfish about the way I feel, but I know it could get a lot worse which adds to my anxiety. I really feel this is affecting my health and I keep thinking I will never get this time back. Maybe it's because she is not my mom, but I am not feeling the reward and love that is sometimes described here. I'm just wondering what fellow caregives do with feelings like mine and if there are any suggestions on how to get over them.