Sibling lives in Colorado. She is trying to give me the guilt trip. She believes I don't care about our dad, because I'm not willing to give up my job to care for him. I'm tired of feeling guilty and made like I don't care. I don't know what to do.
The sibling who does not work does the caregiving. That was me as my one sibling worked. I moved to New England from the Mid Atlantic to care for my mom.
Why doesn't your sibling work? Are they disabled? Need more information. Reason I ask is that I am disabled and just happened to live near Mom and so carried a lot more of the burden even though I was not able to do so financially nor physically. Need to know more about your sibling's situation.
I just lost my father in mid October. Having said that.. don’t let you’re sibling influence any decision you make. I don’t know what your relationship is with your father, or your desire for one. Let that be your only guide. I wish you good luck and blessings whatever you do
I understand, caregiving alters career paths, that's for sure. It also always has a way of becoming a way more than 9-5 commitment. It is difficult even when we don't have others relying on our paycheck. It would be nice if it were possible to drop off our loved ones in a safe, loving place to live but most families don't have the extra tens of thousands of dollars that nursing homes cost yearly. And many nursing homes are hardly what I call safe or loving.
We all understand, or know from experience at least, that caring for a loved one requires sacrifices from all. But no one more than those doing the hands on day to day work who often lose out on possible earnings or social security credits, or retirement savings etc. Therefore the impact of caregiving continues long after a loved one passes.
As long as everyone does a lot of research into possible options, their costs and any alternatives, and are willing to do some realistic planning and soul searching it is possible to find a way to together provide the support your loved one needs without having to deal with any unhelpful guilt trips.
It would be nice if it were possible to drop off our loved ones in a safe, loving place to live but most families don't have the extra tens of thousands of dollars that nursing homes cost yearly. And many nursing homes are hardly what I call safe or loving.
We all understand, or know from experience at least, that caring for a loved one requires sacrifices from all. But no one more than those doing the hands on day to day work who often lose out on possible earnings or social security credits, or retirement savings etc. Therefore the impact of caregiving continues long after a loved one passes.
As long as everyone does a lot of research into possible options, their costs and any alternatives, and are willing to do some realistic planning and soul searching it is possible to find a way to together provide the support your loved one needs without having to deal with any unhelpful guilt trips.