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My 88 yr. old father has live-in caregivers. He talks about sex a lot and has offended the females and the young male caregiver. Sometimes this happens when he is being cleaned. I have talked to him about respect and sexual harassment but it falls on deaf ears. He is extremely narcissistic and has no "filter" on his mouth. He is harmless in that he cannot move around without help - uses a wheelchair and walker, but just last night said suggestive things to our new 22 yr. old female who he had previously called "like a daughter" to him. This was very new and disturbing to her. His doctor thinks it is great that my father feels this good and will not prescribe anything to thwart his libido. Although he did mention "cutting off his p----! I find myself having to apologize for him not just at his home, but also when we take him out.

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He does not have dementia, but is frustrated and depressed with his loss of mobility. I have recently learned (through his caregiver) that when he was in the Merchant Marine during WWII his roommate, who was twice as big as he, would rape him. He has been having bad dreams for a long time and does not sleep well, even with prescription sleep aids. I am now thinking that he (and he is agreeable to this) needs to talk with some sort of psychologist and maybe this will be the answer to his sexual behavior. Does anyone know where I can start my search for the right professional? I really appreciate all of your feedback so far.
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On the other hand, if he DOES have dementia, this might be a symptom. Ask his doctor about it.
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If this man doesn't have dementia, then he's being a disgusting pig and needs to pull his head in. Threaten him with whatever it takes to get him to behave himself. People are trying to help him and he's responding with verbal sexual abuse. It's not on - whether he's capable of following through with it or not.
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(What can I do about my father (88) who talks about sex most of the time and is disrespectful to females, including his caregivers? )
I would tell your father what he don't want to hear.Sad but,sometimes a little fib goes along way.Warning him should scare him enough to stop calling names and watching his month.Tell him a fib like,Dad someone reported you to adult protective services for talking dirty.Warm him.After he hears that he will watch his steps.
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My 19 year old niece is studying to be a nurse. She told me that her instructors have informed them that taking care of patients involves a lot of sexual harrassments. The instructor then gave some examples of what she has to deal with - groping, sexual comments, etc.... So, if these caregivers have had some formal training or from years of caregiving experiences, they will know that when it comes to elderlies - they lost their "filter". They will know that this is part of caregiving. BUT, when the comments now progresses to actual touching, again, it will depend on the caregiver's experience. If they are experienced enough, they can firmly remind the patient that it is inappropriate, etc....

Here are 2 links from this site that might help you. I did a Search engine on the top right of this site, using "elderly and sexual comments."

1.
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/dad-dementia-inappropriate-sexual-comments-163230.htm

Most professional caregivers are well trained in how to handle these episodes, so I wouldn't worry too much about their reaction. You may feel better if you talk with someone at the AFL who works with your father. Choose someone you particularly like, so you feel safe. Then ask if he's ever talked with him or her about sexual activity. Likely he has. Bringing this topic out into the open should help you cope.
We hate to see our loved ones act in such an undignified manner, but it happens. Nurses and CNAs are generally aware that they can get grabbed or swatted on the behind. They can be asked directly for sex. They can be pelted with sexual language that would shock family members. But most professionals take this in stride.

2. https://www.agingcare.com/questions/I-am-a-professional-caregiver-and-my-client-makes-sexual-comments-144526.htm

There are more on this subject.
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