Family and friends distancing themselves from the caregiver. Why?
This is 4 moths now into the care of my elderly parents. They were injured in a car accident--not their fault--the guy ran the red light. It has been ups and downs, but mostly downs. I have the POA. Dealing with their banks, now 2 lawyers--one for the car accident since their insurance company is refusing to pay up due to their age. 88 and 90. Car insurance company is now saying it was their fault, due to age. Then the elder care lawyer to get them on Medicaid. All the paperwork is continues. Social Security is no prize either. But I do it. They are both in a great nursing facility, but that changes week by week. One week, they are ready to go to Assisted Living, the next week no. I have 2 I have interviewed and liked. The others, no. Mom and Dad still get regular--a few times a week, visits from pastors and people in their church. That is wonderful. When this first happened, it seemed like everyone just rallied around us with phone calls and emails and help. I guess I should consider myself lucky. I have 1 good friend who is going thru kinda the same thing with her elderly father and a cousin going thru the same thing with her mother. They have been my lifelines. Others seemed to have backed off. So I do not email or call them anymore. Let them email or call me. I am careful with these folks and try to stay upbeat and talk about their lives and children, not so much about my parents. It is funny, they were so here in the beginning to offer help and encouragement, now nothing. I guess when you go thru a crises, you find out who is really there for you. I have sought professional help for me with all of this. That is helping me to keep my sanity. Why do people distance themselves after awhile?