My 71-year old mother is badly suffering from Alzheimer's. She cannot bathe or feed herself, she wanders outside of the home, and she can't remember her children and often her husband. My 77 year old father is able bodied, and is her primary caregiver. Unfortunately, he possesses no natural aptitude for caregiving, feeding her frozen dinners, not bathing her regularly, and not making sure she's taking her medication. She has wandered away in the night on multiple occasions without him even knowing.
We have pleaded with my father that she needs more than he is giving, but he clings to two things: one, that she belligerently wants to stay home and 2) that her condition will definitely decline if her situation changes. Is that true in your experience? I feel like if she was in a program, had a caregiver or went to a facility where they provided better care, she could actually feel better. I think if he really though that it would help her situation, he might enlist more help but as it is, he thinks she would just reject any outside help. She did freak out when he took her to a facility for a tour and tried to run away so now he's convinced it would never work. Has anyone had this experience? Any thoughts or advice?