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We just found out that my parents caregiver is not only stealing their meds & ended up in rehab for drug addiction but is also stealing jewlery among not keeping a very healthy home for them. They are also living with my parents in lieu of rent. How to you evict them when it's all here say and the caregiver constantly lies to get their way? Also we believe that jewlery is missing and they are using their bank account unauthorized.

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Thanks all. I know it's been some time that I posted this but this caretaker has actually left and as of last July 2013 and we have gotten someone much better info for them. They still only want to pay them 15-18 hrs / week but they are actually getting some things accomplished and my husband and I have been able to back away some and leave things alone unless there is an emergency. Now the below is occurring. Ugggg! When is there a break?
Dear Heavenly Father, I ask that you provide us with the strength & patience to know how to handle my ailing mother in law being forced to go back home with my elderly father in law who has dementia after being in a nursing/ rehab from many complications from diabetes, renal failure and Parkinson's disease. She's allowed to remain in the nursing facility up to 100 days paid by Medicare but because this is an ongoing occurrence and she had been in there from August through October and then had to return around Christmas, she used up her 100 days very quickly this time mainly because the 100 days apparently doesn't begin again until I believe you have been out for 60 days and then have another hospital stay. She can't walk or get around at all and needs total skilled nursing and they aren't unwilling to really pay for much help for lack of financial planning. It has really become a burden on my husband, his brother, my sister in law and myself over the past 4 years the most but it all truly began 14 years when she had quadruple by-pass surgery. She has never maintained her disease and now it has become all of our burdens and heartaches to deal with. It is causing great stress in my marriage and has caused us to place our lives on hold. Please provide us with the strength, patience, courage & wisdom to be able to do what is best for both of my in laws even if it means backing away and allowing the state to take over because they refuse to have us help them and believe that they can handle things on their own until my mother in law falls and then it's a crisis & demand that we rush to them. Each time they call 911 it's recorded & eventually APS (adult protective services is contacted) They even recently requested that my husband quit his job and we both move in so that they don't have to pay for anyone. He had to tough love it and tell them no because we have responsibilities of our own such as a mortgage and can not afford to do that. Then my mother in law proceeds on calling my husband inconsiderate when we have been at their beck and call for years now. We have tired to get the ball rolling on Wills, Trusts, POA's and assistance and they say they will think about it. Nothing ever happens. It's now been 4 years that this has been going on and we are at our wits ends and don't know where to turn. Lord please provide us with that is needed to do what is best for them as we really don't want to just turn away but with them not allowing us to assist them really, what choice are they giving us. We are not legal guardians and we do not care to be. I ask this is your heavenly name Lord.
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Captain.... please start your answers about caregiver stealing meds with a disclaimer...... I.e. .... except for the paid caregivers I know personally on AC.... thank you!!!! You are a turd, but I still love you....
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Make sure you have your facts straight, as recommended a nanny cam can provide provide proof of guilt or innocence. Armed with that, forget eviction and go for arrest, if appropriate, followed by a restraining order.
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Stealing is a criminal offense so, as stated several times above, the police should be notified, although the nanny cam suggestion is good too, for unarguable proof. If it was just general not taking care of them properly and didn't include stealing, usually Adult Protective Services can help too.
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call the cops, etc.. theylle tell you that narcotic theft is so prevalent and difficult to prove that all you can do is get a locked drug safe. then they might imply that your elder is an opium hor who sells her meds. sadly, the artificially inflated value of the meds make anything possible. do i think carers swipe narcotics ? by the handfulls.. lol
still its pretty unfunny to falsely accuse someone. elders lose / overuse / retake pills.
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Get a nanny cam. Do a random urine test. CALL THE COPS. They will come out and interview everyone, that alone should scare her off.
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Cbups she's bluffing.. I highly doubt she'll sue you. Your first priority is your Mom's safety. Get a restraining order if need be..
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i have a caregiver who i suspect of doing drugs and refuses a drug test I have fired her but she says she cant move out in two days & will sue me. Isn't there anything i can do? Im afraid my mom isn't safe when I'm at work
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AllisonBoBalison: We have tried to remove items from the house on a borrower and in other words to try to protect their belongings and then they call and request them be returned. We have tried to conveniently stall but then when they insist we have to return them. They have no will or trust to protect their estate so we also don't want the state to get their hands on anything after they are gone. It's a very sticky situation that they have put us in for sure. Classic case of the Ant & The Grasshopper fable.
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havefaith - I would take all easily pawned valuables, such as jewelry, out of the house for safekeeping... or at the least, take pictures of these items with a camera that can record the date on the picture, so that if/when they come up missing you can take that "evidence" to your parents and give them the wake up call they so obviously need. Good luck, sorry about your situation.
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@ Perseverance: That's the entire problem is that my parents tell us one thing and the caretaker the next and because we do not live there or have security cameras installed we have no absolute proof. I'd rather not call the cops until I have concreate proof.
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@ Everishlass: The caretaker was apparently a neighbor out of work who didn't know them beforehand and they slowly worked their way into living with them because their house was forclosed on. So to answer you question my parents hired them but there is no legal lease and I have contacted the sherriff's department who referred me over to the magistrate and they said that in order to to evict them there would have to be a form filled out for unlawful detainment if they choose to stay after we have requested them to leave. I called the sherriff's dept. to find out our legal stance before we said anything. They can't give legal advice and said to speak to a lawyer. These people keep saying they are leaving but then never do. My parents are too naieve and trusting to stand up for themselves to force them to leave. When we tell them that we will be glad to ask them to leave they always tell us no but then always want our assistance when things happen. We had to go over there recently and steamclean the carpets where soda and coffee was spilt not only by my father but mostly by the caretaker and their family of 3 teens and husband. They have completely trashed the house that was once beautiful.
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Stealing drugs, money, and jewelry? Call the cops. Seriously. But you better make sure that this is in fact true, and that your parents aren't trying to manipulate you.
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Who hired this caregiver? Can the person who hired the caregiver fire the caregiver? Is the caregiver an independent or was she hired through an agency? Either way, the caregiver can still be fired. You may be suspicious about some of her actions, have no proof, but you said the environment is not healthy for your parents. That's grounds right there to fire the caregiver. If you want the caregiver gone, get rid of her.
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