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My husband has had Alzheimer's for 5 years and has been in a facility for the last five months. I visit him everyday, he is so happy to see me, but when it is time for me to leave he gets very upset. He does not understand why I cannot stay and why he cannot come home with me. I used to tell him I would be right back but he told me "that is not true, you don't". I tell him I go every day, I don't know whether he believes me. Is there a way to handle the good byes - May be I shouldn't go as often?.

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Thanks - they have some activities, he doesn't like any of the things they do, I understand as they seem to be geared for women (who are in the majority there). I have asked the nurses and social worker but nothing I have tried seems to work. And yes it is torture, I am going to go three or four times a week instead of every day - iy might help me!
AliciaCC
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when i leave my aunt at nh i always tell her ive got to go back to work . most times its true but even when its not it makes sense to her .
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A kiss on the cheek ALWAYS
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Alicia, this must be torture for you. Is he in a facility that "gets" dementia? Meaning, are there activities he can participate in, some socialization and music activities he would enjoy? In other words, if you didn't go everyday, would he get more engaged in the activities and not miss you quite as much?

You might want to consult with the social worker on staff about this issue. My heart goes out to you.
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