Is it sadness, guilt from resentment,or wishing we had done a better job?
My mom's needs are growing almost daily and as an only child I feel overwhelmed. Assisted living is not the answer, she's needy and helpless in many ways, thanks to my dad who pampered her. At 88 she's not going to get any better. I don't want to lose her but I'm legitimately tired of caring for her )almost 12 years now), many of those when she could have and should have cared for herself. That is not the case anymore and it appears she facing a slow decline. Like many of us, our relationship was not great but that's irrelevant at this point. I'm resentful about her neediness, often at my expense and worry that I'm going to feel lots of guilt when she's gone. I doing the best I can but never feel it's good enough. She doesn't want friends and doesn't get along with her family so I'm her everything. It's limited what I can do with my life, even our home. My husband wants to retire and sell our home/business but uprooting her from her MIL will likely cause confusion and further deterioration. And to make it worse, I was raised to be a dotting daughter along with my father. I just want to feel good when all is said and done but I'm not sure I will because I'm always at my wit's end :-/