I am 80 and don't shower at home any longer since I live alone and have a step-over tub to get into the shower. I'm afraid of falling. I go to my local gym as often as possible, at least before any appointments. I can't make it every day particularly in the winter, so happy to see that it's ok to go longer without one.
We discovered that mom stopped bathing. It was an odor that made me realize she was having trouble with this. Its a combination of her physical problems and her dementia. The best solution I can come up with is to get in the shower with her (I have underwear on). The most difficult part is getting her out of her clothes and back into a fresh outfit afterward. She has a terrible time with the steps involved in removing clothing. After the first time I shut myself in my own bathroom and cried. It's better now that we have a system down.
My grandmother has kidney disease and must bathe every other day. My mother and I were there when the doctor said full on bath or shower not those wipes.Not only to make sure her private area is clean (to keep out UTI's) but having issues with your kidneys can change skin PH and make you stink. Grandma wasn't happy about that and still won't bathe. She will go three weeks without a bath. Since she lives by herself, we are just waiting for that crisis call.
Mom was never big on bathing. She has always chosen to use the bathroom sink and a washcloth. Since she won't allow anyone to help her in the bathroom, it's impossible to know if she is taking care of personal hygeine.
My grandma showers every day due to her incontinence and honestly because if she doesn't she appears to get itchy rashes in her folds. I only have her hair washed every few days though since that doesn't appear to bother her. Everyday after the shower, she gets her face lotion put on, her legs massaged with lotion as well and gets powdered to help with the rashes she gets from sweating. If she goes without a shower for longer than two days, the rashes get really flared up and are hard to manage. It takes me a few days of constant powder and prescription creams to bring the rashes back into being managed.
Living in a Caribbean island if you do not bath every day you feel really unconfortable,since there is not aircondition in most homes. So, body lotion is recomended.
204wymberly, I had a broken upper arm and was sling bound... but I was allowed to take off the sling to get into the shower. It was painful but a person has to do what they need to do. What a mess trying to bathe and trying to towel dry :P I did cut back on my showers during the healing process, and bought those baby wet wipes to use in between showers.
Call a few caregiving Agencies to see what they have available, if you are able to afford a professional paid caregiver.
if it were not for this sling I could bathe myself, but I only have use of my right hand (fortunately). would love to find someone near by to come in for 2-3 hours daily,or at least three times a week.
Brecka428 if Mum won't shower then you could always bed bath her. You can get inflatable baths so that you can wash her hair (just google inflatable hair wash baths) or you can also get (again google it) a non rinse shower cap - not so good for permanent use but as an inbetweener works well. If she doesn't want to wash - then you have a bigger problem.
My mum is 93 and is worn out by showering - she tends to sleep for about 2 hours afterwards so I still manage to get her in the shower but between times I use no rinse body wash and I buy disposal DRY wipes - they vary hugely in price so shop around then I just use those in water with the no rinse body wash. I dry her using a hair dryer on warm if her skin is crepey but hers usually isn't. Then I massage cream into her body - back arms legs finish off with a barrier cream on the vulval and anal area and from time to time also need to use it in the groin area.
If you are going to bed bath put either towels down or better still a waterproof sheet. I don't find it takes any longer than a shower, even if I do wash her hair in bed. If you're not sure how to go about it there are heaps of videos on you tube that are really useful.
To get mum to have a shower I use two approaches. i either say the doctor says you need to have a shower once a week now so that we can be sure you don't get an infection especially a UTI. OR I say mum I know you don't want to have a shower but I must make sure you are clean 'down there' (mum doesn't do normal terminology for anything below the waist - well below the neck really ) so if it isn't a shower then we have to go the bed bath route. Don't worry I can wash your hair as well - then you have it covered either way.
If she is still adamant and won't let you wash her at all then use wet wipes. not the best solution but better than nothing. when Mum has been poorly I have used those to wipe her down and they use them in the hospitals over here a lot.
For the past year we have been caring for my 92 year-old grandma. She is in very good health. She is only on a water pill and one for cholesterol, as far as her meds go. She has always showered for us once a week (didn't look forward to it but did it) but now she has absolutely refused for the last 2 months. I agree with the concept that she came up in an era where people didn't shower daily but we are not imposing that on her. All we ask is once a week and she is absolutely defiant about it. I am at my wits end and don't know what to do. Any insight or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
Caregivers with experience surely know these things, but since I had to learn the hard way (like most of us about most of caregiving), I would like to share a few tips about skin care for those of you who are new to caregiving. While talking about showering ... the subject of yeast infections and skin breaking out in body "rolls" and "folds" is important to note as well. If your loved ones are carrying a little or a lot of extra weight and therefore have any body parts that create one or more folds or creases, you should know that these areas are breeding grounds for yeast infections as well as bed and body sores, as well as skin tears. Once a yeast infection appears, it is very difficult to get rid of them without the proper prescription medication, which must be applied regularly (there are several options, but I prefer nystatin powder). An oral medication (such as Diflucan) may also be needed. Further, once a yeast infection appears, it easily becomes recurrent. For women, regular checks are needed in the following areas (especially if large / heavy): (1) under the breasts; (2) under the belly; (3) between the groin folds at the top of the legs; (4) any where else on the body where there are these types of folds. Lastly, don't forget to check the buttocks for skin tears and bed sores. Elder skin is so thin!! When the elderly have problems getting out of their chairs, they tend to scoot or slide from the back of the seat to the front and that scooting action can shear their skin through their clothing - and then they are embarrassed to tell anyone that they are having a problem. I don't have any experience with men, sorry! I hope this helps someone. :)
I am just seeing the post by bsw in 2012 and realize that it is rather old, but thought I would let everyone know that we use the waterless disposable cloths that you can put in the microwave for about 15 seconds so they are nice and warm (part of the resistance in bathing is the cold). Each pack has one cloth for each body part - I believe there are 8. We also use the waterless shampoo caps to wash hair. Awesome items for those who either can't or won't take showers as often as they should and/or are confined to a bed. Both of these have worked out very well for us. Another tip - if you don't have time to wash hair and need to get rid of the oily look quickly, put baby powder (like J&J) in the hair and mix well through scalp and hair until powder soaks up oil. Brush or comb hair until scalp and hair no longer show any powder. Hair looks amazing!! Still need to wash a little bit later, but for an emergency, this is a great quick fix! Good luck all!
Worried why dont you tell her that you will come by every Tuesday (or any day of choice) to bathe her - or twice a week if she will tolerate it. That way she will be in a routine. You could spin a story about someone you know being told by the doctor that now they are older they need to really make sure they are clean at least twice a week because as they get older they are at greater risk of infections - especially in the genital area. Although you may not know that person it is not so far from the truth. The creases of the groin are prime areas for tears as they get older especially in warm weather when they sweat
Im lucky in that Mum likes a shower/bath. You need to get her into a routine and if she can't manage for herself what about a bath nurse?
it;s now been 10 days since her last shower and my husband told her it was time to bathe again. She said it hasn't been that long and it has. Btw she has all her marbles. I know of a woman who ended up getting gangrene due to bad hygiene. Part of me wants to tell her of this but I don't want to be ugly about it. I'm just baffled as to why I have to tell a grown woman to bathe and to tell her how nasty this is. If she was immobile or couldn't do this herself, I would totally understand.
It depends on how elderly. I am what is considered elderly. I shower by myself with no trouble at all, twice a day. Hubby, elderly, showers himself, once a day. Somewhat elderly people might be showered 2 to 3 times a week. It also depends on how active they are and the weather.
My mother-in-law is a 72 year old woman that gets around ok but has COPD and is limited on things. I've noticed that she doesn't bath unless something is said and it always comes from my husband in a joking manner but is a serious issue. I feel like I I need to have a talk with her about feminine hygiene because she'll go weeks up to 5 or 6 sometimes without bathing. She has not washed her hair in over 3 months. I have offered to help her and in the few times in over 2 years that we've been living with her she has let me. This makes me cringe because I am a very clean person. She comes from the country and I don't think she knows about some of the illnesses she and my husband and I could get. How do I tell her she needs to bathe more often?
I have to say mum showers every day foor 2 reasons. The first and foremost is me me me I am afraid - I find it easier to shower her because I have a large bath length shower which is fine now but soon wont be as there is no way on gods earth I could get a wheelchair in there. I also find it easier to then take her into the bedroom and I use two hairdiers to dry her more tender areas (on a slow warm (not fast or hot) speed and temperature) while she stays cosy warm wrapped in usually two towels. The hairdryer works well on her feet and between her toes - I have tried using a towel but she says it hurts her and as for the more tender intimate places if I tried to use a towel to rub or in actual fact pat dry it tends to trigger a wee so we end up having another wash.
My second reason for the shower is thet every day I cram my mums body from head to toe. I use a nice middle of the range moisturiser for her face. I use again a middle of the range nice smelling body butter for the rest of her - I do the whole body and it seems to a) make her skin more supple and less prone to tears b) stop the pain in her knees a little c) ease her back pain and actually does help her pass a stool sometimes too and finally d) is the only physical contact she will ever have. I wash her hair once a week and then hse has a full oil head massage the night before the shampoo and then we get it all washed off leaving her hair really shiny.
I guess I am doing something right for the hospital said she had the best skin they had seen on a 92 year old - not one tear no sores nothing. Mind you she was only in for a week and came home with 4 tears all in the groin area but they were soon sorted when I went back to our old routine
Danztronic: Always rinse off urine from body parts immediately, not once a week. A shower, complete, can be weekly, otherwise make it a body part specific cleaning.
Maryindc: Actually using a soft, natural sponge, with lots of tepid water instead of a washcloth will help, to start. Be sure to place plastic sheeting below tons of absorbant towels so you can squeeze water onto the patient instead of rubbing. Maybe some more experienced caregivers here can recommend if an oil bath of some kind would work? Is baby oil still used? Do you rinse it off?
My 94-year-old mother lives at her home alone. She has CNAs in every day to help with bathing, dressing, meals, etc. She loves having a daily shower and lotion applied all over, especially if the lotion is massaged in over her back and shoulders (with are often sore from arthritis, previous broken bones, and sitting a lot all day). In fact, when ever she complains about having the CNAs in "all day", I remind her that she wouldn't get a shower every day or the same personal attention in a nursing home!
I am 75 years old, I used to take a shower everyday and as a woman ive always enjoyed my daily shower.Nowadays my lower legs are disabled, nor my knees but I walk like a Penguin`so for tha past 5 years I use my little 3 pound walker and with that I walk just like I did in my youth. When my husband of 57 years takes me out to dinner he insists he push me in a small transport chair in lieu of a wheelchair. It works very well and otherwise I am in phenomenal health. By the was I have been a type 2 Insulin dependent Diabetic from age 35 to the present. Hey all of you Diabetic`s know you can live your life to the fullest get to your doctors and do as they say. Last week I had a barage of Blood tests all were great. My A!C was 4.2. I am the mother too 6 adult children and 3 Grandchildren. We are so blesses. Come on senior`s you can do it. Many blessings many healings.
We try to get gma to shower once a week. she has ankle bandages though so she'd probably shower more if she didn't. When I change her bandages I clean her lower legs and then massage with lotion. She LOVES it. she has issues with circulation so sometimes her legs swell so the massage helps with that alot. WHen my fiance changes the bandages, no massage. So obviously, she loves when I do it :)
I constantly argue with my mum about the frequency of the showering process, and thank you for proving me wrong, I always thought you had to shower an elderly person daily however after your suggestion, I am now learned in the fact that at least once a week is fine. Although she suffers from incontinence, i always thought that this would be the main reason for showering daily. I must drive her crazy with my constant nagging for showering. She is 80 this year and am the only son out of 5 looking after her, I do love her dearly but couldn't handle her showering habits.
Call a few caregiving Agencies to see what they have available, if you are able to afford a professional paid caregiver.
My mum is 93 and is worn out by showering - she tends to sleep for about 2 hours afterwards so I still manage to get her in the shower but between times I use no rinse body wash and I buy disposal DRY wipes - they vary hugely in price so shop around then I just use those in water with the no rinse body wash. I dry her using a hair dryer on warm if her skin is crepey but hers usually isn't. Then I massage cream into her body - back arms legs finish off with a barrier cream on the vulval and anal area and from time to time also need to use it in the groin area.
If you are going to bed bath put either towels down or better still a waterproof sheet. I don't find it takes any longer than a shower, even if I do wash her hair in bed. If you're not sure how to go about it there are heaps of videos on you tube that are really useful.
To get mum to have a shower I use two approaches. i either say the doctor says you need to have a shower once a week now so that we can be sure you don't get an infection especially a UTI. OR I say mum I know you don't want to have a shower but I must make sure you are clean 'down there' (mum doesn't do normal terminology for anything below the waist - well below the neck really ) so if it isn't a shower then we have to go the bed bath route. Don't worry I can wash your hair as well - then you have it covered either way.
If she is still adamant and won't let you wash her at all then use wet wipes. not the best solution but better than nothing. when Mum has been poorly I have used those to wipe her down and they use them in the hospitals over here a lot.
Im lucky in that Mum likes a shower/bath. You need to get her into a routine and if she can't manage for herself what about a bath nurse?
I need to have a talk with her about feminine hygiene because she'll go weeks up to 5 or 6 sometimes without bathing. She has not washed her hair in over 3 months. I have offered to help her and in the few times in over 2 years that we've been living with her she has let me. This makes me cringe because I am a very clean person. She comes from the country and I don't think she knows about some of the illnesses she and my husband and I could get. How do I tell her she needs to bathe more often?
My second reason for the shower is thet every day I cram my mums body from head to toe. I use a nice middle of the range moisturiser for her face. I use again a middle of the range nice smelling body butter for the rest of her - I do the whole body and it seems to a) make her skin more supple and less prone to tears b) stop the pain in her knees a little c) ease her back pain and actually does help her pass a stool sometimes too and finally d) is the only physical contact she will ever have. I wash her hair once a week and then hse has a full oil head massage the night before the shampoo and then we get it all washed off leaving her hair really shiny.
I guess I am doing something right for the hospital said she had the best skin they had seen on a 92 year old - not one tear no sores nothing. Mind you she was only in for a week and came home with 4 tears all in the groin area but they were soon sorted when I went back to our old routine
Maybe some more experienced caregivers here can recommend if an oil bath of some kind would work? Is baby oil still used? Do you rinse it off?
I am the mother too 6 adult children and 3 Grandchildren. We are so blesses. Come on senior`s you can do it. Many blessings many healings.