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My elderly neighbor is 92 years old (WWII Vet) and suffers from diagnosed dementia. He can make himself a bowl of cereal and he eats lots of ice cream but is unable to cook or even use his microwave to make TV dinners. His personal care has really been diminishing lately and I wonder about him getting sick from bacteria. Also, his home has a lot of mice in it (evidence in the silverware drawer and cupboards). He has three sons, only one of which is within an hour's drive. The closest son brings food (bananas, milk, cereal, frozen dinners) once a week and seems to do no more than that. I have explained to the son what I have noticed but it hasn't seemed to help. I think he still sees his dad as someone from 10-20 years ago. Anyway, what else can I do except become a self-appointed care provider pro-bono?

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You have a perfectly legitimate reason to report your concerns, even if it is just a fig-leaf excuse - mice multiply, and when they do, some emigrate. Bless the little furry dears. And you don't want them taking an interest in your wiring.

So contact your local authorities, and let one thing lead to another until someone is taking a more practical interest in how your neighbour is coping. Have no qualms! You're not trying to get this lovely gentlemen evicted, and you're not accusing his sons of anything. You're just waving and asking for attention on his behalf.
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I really would not become a self appointed care provider pro-bono as you job will increase in time and effort, and possibly expense, and you have no authority in the situation. The son is in denial, and that is not surprising as he does not see his dad day to day, If I were you, I would contact the local Agency for Aging and also Social Services for information about resources and also to alert them of a vulnerable senior.

I think I would document what you see for the agencies and for the son. Include the help you are giving him. Give it to all of them in writing. It may carry more weight.

Kudos to you for being a concerned neighbour. The man needs assistance, preferably from his family. Don't take it all on.
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Does your local Department of Human Services have an Adult Protective Care Unit? I know it kinda sounds like calling CPS for kids...but sometimes it takes someone in authority to wake the grown children out of their denial (or fear that they may need to do something).
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